Wednesday, February 10, 2010

we be rapping it out in church...yo

i was talking to a billion (ok not really a billion, more like 6) people on facebook and other assorted ways last night...but i felt i was missing something. i wasnt a thing, it was a person. i picked up my phone trying to figure out who it was i felt i needed to talk to...i felt the name and text him (no youre not getting a name yet). well i have never just randomly text him and it was late...but he answered. learned he was leaving town early the next morning. we just text back and forth for hours...i think til what 2? in the morning...sounds about right...finished up my math homework about 330 and after taking some pills to knock me out, fell asleep around 4.

well the alarm finally got me out of bed...made myself a bowl of cereal, got ready for class

...(pause while i talk to him right this moment)... ok im back.

went to math class, came back to my room and took a nap til my history class at called and woke me up...half slept talked to her until she let me go back to sleep...alarm woke me up, went to history and sat with kayla and kenzie as usual.....then my phone buzzes and buzzes and buzzes and buzzes....i figure its my alarm going off on vibrate so i ignore it...then i wonder if its really a phone call, so i look at it...and its the guy from last night he's supposed to be on his way to reno...why in the world is he calling me...since i cant really leave the room to talk to him i text him asking whats up...he just asks that i call him back when i get a second. he tells me his service is going in and out so if he doesnt answer to just text him and he'll get back to me when he has signal.

class gets out and so i call him, no answer. i go buy mom a card for her bday and he calls me...we chitchat for little bit. he loses signal. he calls back and says...."i have a question for you"....i think my heart stopped...
me- ok...what is it?
him- so theres this thing the institute is doing...
me- uh huh...
him- would uh, would you mind if i sent you a singing gram like friday?
me- (pause) ...if you feel you should or you want to send me one, then i will accept it
him- ok! ill have to know when a good time to send it is and where to send them. k well im about to lose service so ill talk to you later k?
me- k...bye
him- bye

from then on the day only got better and better. classes went well, i had something to look forward to this weekend, and i was smiling from ear to ear. he and i text back and forth most of the afternoon and evening, and then he called me after church cause he had "a funny story" to tell me. told me more about what he's doing in reno and when he'll be back. we have a deal set up...who ever gets to the firesides first saves the other a seat (that way we get to see each other every fireside).

and during enrichment...we are working on a making a rap about the bishop or the bishopric...we shall see how this goes...and yes. we will be using my mad break dancing skills (or lack thereof lol)

justin and i have been texting for the last few mins...things are all good and in a year or two who knows...maybe we can meet up for lunch and catch up...its like a nice closure in a way...the public explosion unsettled me and now that he and i talked last night and tonight, i know i can move on a lot easier now. things will always be there...memories and such but now i think i can look back without it hurting much and eventually it wont hurt at all. i know he did this for my sake as well as his. he got me to where i am today and im extraordinarily grateful to him for that. we had differences and with us each going our separate way, we will each be happier in the long run. seems we are both already noticeably happier. i wish him the best. i wish him happiness. i wish for great days and nights to the both of us. ill always be here as a friend to you justin. just dont ask for too much, too soon. thank you for everything and ill see you around someday. good luck.

on another note, i have a friend. someone who's always been there for me through the good and bad. yes, he was once a boyfriend, but i broke it off. he's been a great friend and guide and source of laughter and many eye rolls (from sarcasm and stupid stuff) since. he and i have stayed in touch since he joined the navy...where he went from basic, to chicago, to san diego...he is deploying in a little while and is on leave to see family...ive asked him to come see me in utah before he ships out cause as tough as i know he is...i still worry my friend will come home in a body bag. its not an easy job...he is a navy corpsman. he runs with the marines...and patches them up. so he says he and a buddy will come down next weekend after some time back in clarksville...we shall see how much he and his buddy destroy in cedar before they leave...jk...kinda lol.

anyways i have a math test to review for, a biology test to try and study for and then bed....hopefully i dont miss the test at 8 in the morning...later