tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13534906304270927022024-03-12T17:28:59.777-06:00Life and Adventures of Rachel*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comBlogger42125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-82891418951099245422011-01-29T13:39:00.004-07:002011-01-29T14:11:03.695-07:00to celebrate or not celebrate?ok. here is it week until im no longer a teenager...(woody and my mom are not so secretly jumping for joy at this thought) lol...mom because 1 down 2 to go...and woody? because he wont be dating a teenager anymore lol...and because we'll only be 6 yrs apart and not 7 (if you go strictly by numbers) this all is only slightly relevent to anything that has happened in the last few weeks tho.<div><br /></div><div>in case we forgot who i live with....</div><div>ciana </div><div>(new roomie) from tooele and taller than me and frankly is just like alexis (my last roomie) just cleaner and neater (by house standards) but is just like alexis in the boy way. she cant not flirt or bring boys home to hang out until 2 in the morning. she says she has been in several movies and for those that have seen forever strong (the movie) she kissed the main character on the cheek (because she asked him is she could). </div><div><br /></div><div>kayla </div><div>remember her from last year? from grand junction and is waiting for her prince to sweep her off her feet...and waiting for her missionary at the same time. she is smaller than me...but apt life is starting to kick in the sophmore 15</div><div><br /></div><div>kenz</div><div>also from last year. from vegas and has not really tried to even try on the glass slippers in the hopes of finding her prince. she says she simply wants someone to love her but she has no desire to love someone back right now. eats nothing but junk food....and is the reason i would much rather not eat taquitos ;) </div><div><br /></div><div>eliza</div><div>from alaska but her family moved over by moab when she came here. smart girl. on the deans list. good girl and actually cooks. has a solid bf from st george and we all basically have guesses as to when he will propose ...(sort of) has consistent head splitting migraines (and yes many of us think bad things will happen down the road because of them) </div><div><br /></div><div>jen</div><div>from gusher (so named because of the oil fields) and wants to find a prince but has no guts in the dating scene. interesting individual...</div><div><br /></div><div>anyways...back to the bday thing...because i am basically the black sheep in the apt i am either the last one to know about things the girls are doing or i am never told. sad huh? not too bad because i usually do productive things or i hang out with woody anyways....however when eliza started dating brad she was left out of many things ans so i wasnt the only one in that particular boat...so we sat the girls down one night and expressed our feelings of how we wished they wouldnt treat us the way they did...well things got better for eliza but im still left out of many things. </div><div><br /></div><div>my dilemma comes now from...they somewhat celebrated kayla's bday....they celebrated 2 of our neighbors bday and they went down to stg to celebrates eliza's bday. sometime last week they asked what kind of cake i wanted...yes woody, the way i responded was not with finesse... i feel like why include me on my day when they dont on a daily basis already? half of me wants to have them do what they want for my bday...however the other half doesnt want to have them included on my birthday. i want to celebrate it with those that care on a daily basis... is that too much to ask?</div><div><br /></div><div>of things for a college student to ask for for a birthday....i asked woody for a living green thing (a plant) lol. perhaps ill push my bday off a day for it to be on super bowl night instead....cause i think woody and i were planning on simply hangin at the sig house (im sure they wont mind the fact that im planning on making a pizza or 2 ;) ....(i swore last year that i would have a super bowl party...) </div><div><br /></div><div>either way, i simply want my bday to be with people that know me, care about me, and love me. is that too much to ask?</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-44818991225409318022011-01-12T23:14:00.002-07:002011-01-13T01:03:13.611-07:00...back to school. it sucks.sunday didnt go like i had thought it would. at all. woody and i wrote down our goals for the semester. for about a week now when i say my prayers i have been almost asking for patience but halfway through the word i stop myself because i know you shouldnt pray for patience...sunday night i realized i need it. i realized there must be some reason that i almost slip night after night... monday i didnt even have a class until 1 pm. it was absolutely divine. i will say though that even though i was given the chance to sleep in since i hadnt set an alarm...i woke up at 9 am. got ready for the day and got to actually make breakfast for myself. woody came over so we could go ahead and read for the day and so that he wouldnt have to worry about trying to fit in homework and scripture time after his sig meetings. we headed off to campus and we signed up for institute class together...the writings of john. i also signed up for old testament part 2 and preparing for a temple marriage. <div><br /></div><div>...let me pause here to explain why i am taking the temple marriage class. no i wont predict that i will be married soon. i could always take this class later however part of my personal goals and goals that woody and i have together is as simple as going and doing baptisms for the dead together when i have my recommend in my hand. this class isnt about finding that one person and marrying them straight off. its emphasized that all things that we work for in life should be within our eternal perspective. since my biggest goal right now in life is to walk into the st george temple really soon. since that and other goals i have do regard eternal perspective, i figured a class that can remind me of my goals and make me think even deeper about things is a class worth taking. enough said right? so if another person asks me when a ring is showing up on my ring finger...i just wont say a word. </div><div><br /></div><div>after all that we headed off to our respective classes and then after my math class...i went and payed for the locker for my p.e. class. im not gonna lie. i need easy a classes for a gpa boost....and i wanna get in shape once again. </div><div><br /></div><div>after working out i went and met with woody out at his truck only to find out that it wont run. it sucks for both of us. he has so much stuff he needs his truck for just regarding school not to mention work. i am TAing for a horsemanship class out at the farm this semester and i need to get out there somehow. regarding the truck...it wasnt towed into a shop until tuesday night and woody said that the shop said it should be all good by friday (cross fingers). had a friend up take up to lin's and we were given 10 mins to get everything we needed...talk about crunch time!!! hard to compare shop when you have a time limit and you have hardly any food that you can cook in your possession at the apartment. </div><div><br /></div><div>tuesday my roommate eliza and i woke up and did the insanity workout...ok. it wasnt even the workout. it was simply the fit test to see where you stood and so that you could see your improvement. we practically died and never in my life...ok not quite...have i felt so fat and gross. its just one of those things that wow...really wakes you up. went to math class and then off to dropping off socks at the gym...where woody followed me out and called me to make sure it was me...lol sure enough it was. we headed to my place so that my roommates boyfriend could drive woody home that night. it was an interesting night and woody found one textbook so riveting that he fell asleep. after the boys were gone us girls went through and threw old food away and organized what we wanted to keep. reorganized the fridge and freezer and tried that good old australian beer bridget and i got up in north utah...its non-alcoholic ginger beer...wasnt bad and so it got passed around the apartment so that everyone could try it. </div><div><br /></div><div>wednesday i caught a ride to campus so i could talk to some of my teachers and so i could sit and read for class. basically after institute with woody i didnt do the old testament class and instead went a worked out with woody...more like we talked while stretching and then ran for our time and then talked while stretching again. it was good though. i had kind of been in a sour mood and i just havent explained why yet but i felt so much better after running. i headed off to my eternal marriage class and then barely made it to my math class in time...and then hitched a ride to the farm for my other class...only to find out he wanted me to TA for the 4 o'clock class and not the 2 o'clock one...so after doing dishes at the apt i got another ride to the library to meet up with woody so that we could read scriptures earlier rather than later and not be able to do it all...after taking care of some things we got reading and then when we were done i called my roommate that was supposed to drive me out to the farm again...straight to voicemail. so i tried again. same thing. sent a text. no response. called again. nada. tried another roomie. same ordeal. i then proceeded to call every person i have in my phone that goes to suu. same thing. no one answered. woody tried some of his people...either they couldnt help for some reason or another or they didnt answer. finally one of the brothers he called was able to help and i was 15 mins late to my class. awesome. hitched a ride back to campus and then met up with woody and bill so that i could help them set up for the club fair. grabbed some pancakes for the mand and then went and read. came back and got a heapin plate of buffalo wings for him and then help pack up and put things away... and now im sitting here writing all this and hopefully my blogging will be consistently consistent this year. hopefully you guys can keep me on track with this...</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-22931689855198978292010-09-16T00:16:00.000-06:002010-09-16T00:20:03.975-06:00Truck drivers, lamb wrestlin’, and catchin’ quail<p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:center"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'AR CENA'; font-size: 19px; line-height: 21px; ">Sounds like a grand time huh? …actually I know what youre thinkin…”wait! You never finished your hospital adventure! …and capitalization?! When did this happen in this blog?!” …calm down. My internet is still down so I type it up on word and just transfer it to the blog…and word document automatically capitalizes for me (boo!) and frankly dont feel like bothering to change it lol. And as for the hospital gig? Ill finish it and itll be up by the end of the week. Does that work? Ah well…cant please em all.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">So the trucker deal….i have a feeling that truckers get bored while driving. That’s why they created satellite radio…so truckers don’t fall asleep and kill people on the road (ok not really but go with it). Truckers have to find ways to stay amused and alert while driving the many hours they put into transport. …this is why they try to scare the crap out of college kids that cross the freeway bridge from the apartments to campus. Here I am minding my own business when right as a tractor trailer goes barreling under the bridge im walking across…usually half asleep…he decides it would be great fun to honk the horn. …listen here you big rig drivers…while I laugh about it now…are you really that bored?! I must say you time it perfectly. Maybe I should actually go look and see if there is a sign that says honk at college students crossing the bridge…or look up in trucker manuals if that’s a rule that must be done or see if there is contest to see how high they can get us to jump…<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">After horsemanship (which went exceptionally well since the teacher wants me to continue to ride the horse with the most attitude because in the hour that I was in the saddle, I settled her down and had her acting better than ever) I went over to the cross hollow event center near the farm to help out with the stock show going on…now let me pause here to announce that I have Never been to a stock show. …this comes as a surprise to many people out here. They figure a girl from Tennessee that’s an agriculture major-animal science degree would have been to tons of stock shows. Hate to disappoint but Thursdays stock show here in cedar city was my first stock show EVER. I have no clue how the scoring goes. Whats the difference between market lambs and regular ewes? Seriously? Come on. So im told to go grab the spotted ewe…uh ok. So I nab her like I saw the 7 year old kids doing earlier and put the halter on her and try to get her to come out of the pen….its a LOT harder than I thought! Anyways I got the hang of it…learned how the scoring system works for stock shows…I actually learned a lot that afternoon.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">Saturday rolls around and woody, blake, and I head up to Parowan to work on some things…we pull up and there were some quail chicks running around outside their pen. Lucky, the neighbors dog, became quite the asset that day…lets just say that border collie caught on fast and helped us find all the little buggers. So here I am with a net in one hand and keepin an eye on the dog because when he caught a chick he had a habit of walking away with it… the thing was the chick hid in the tall grass…which was tall because there was an irrigation pipe in the middle of the grass…so im trompin around with the dog up and down the grass to make sure there were no more out there…lucky froze and then pounced…I snatched the slobbery chick from his mouth and then as im walkin back to the pen another chick runs out in front of me…so a chick in one hand and a net in another I sweep and miss…I go for it again and the chick darted to the side and again I missed…the next time I practically dive bomb the stupid thing and make it…all while managing to muddy myself and land in the swamp I was in…fantastic! So now I get the great task of putting two chicks in the pen at the same time…all in all 12 chicks were found (thankfully that was all that had been in the pen in the first place). 11 were found alive (no the dog didn’t kill any). Out of the 11 found, the dog found and caught 9 on his own and only injured two of them and for a non-bird dog that seems impressive to me. Anyways…it was an interesting day as far a ranch work goes…but a nice respite from town life and classes and roomies<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-86901291292563166872010-08-15T20:25:00.007-06:002010-10-18T10:45:46.726-06:00adventures in a small town ER...contok...here is the second part to the hospital story<br /><br />...now where was i? ...oh yes. arriving at the hospital. so they sit me on a bed in the ER and ask what had been going on since i left them the other day...and then proceed to try to get some blood outa me and start me on an iv. im tired, im sick, and once again in my life my body is refusing to cooperate for the nurses and doctors. they poked me all over the place...blew out two veins and end up calling an off-duty ER nurse to come in to see if she can get it. at that point i was ready to say just stab something and get the blood...but they had to worry about getting an iv in as well so that wouldnt have worked. by the time they were done i had something like 15ish holes in me and was falling asleep. my white blood cell count was through the roof still, i was severely dehydrated, and my spleen and liver were dangerously swollen...i was put into an overnight room and was being given potassium chloride on a fast drip...after the drip starting hurting from the potassium, it was changed and i fell asleep...the bag was changed in the morning and i was given another whole bag of potassium chloride. would be my case on top of this...once im full of fluids my period starts...ugh.<br /><div><br /></div><div>i lay in bed entertaining myself by wondering if people in the trailer park ever watched the people in the hospital like they were rats...then my train of thought would drift...you know that little voice in our head? not like a psychotic one, but like the one we all have...thats how we decide things, how we actually keep sane. anyways...i compared how even when we talk to ourselves...there are those people that move their lips or even gesture when talking to themselves when alone...and the differences you often see between men and women when you notice this.. dont lie...you fall in one of these categories. </div><div><br /></div><div>women are more prone to talk to themselves i feel...we are the sort that have to work things out, plan how things should go, rehearse it, etc...i dont think that guys as a general rule talk to themselves out loud when thinking about things...anyways i had a whole point to that when i sat in the hospital but ive lost that train of thought...what i do remember is when i would get up to go to the bathroom i would unplug the monitor thing and kind of dance with it to the bathroom and when i would come out of the bathroom...i would peek out the door, look around and hum the mission impossible theme song...(yes i did just admit to that) but i had to amuse myself somehow! </div><div><br /></div><div>i find it sad that because im a teenager they have to give me an ultrasound...yes there was more than one purpose to it but still...this time tho at least it was the traditional belly and gel ultrasound....thankfully nothing was found out of place that we didnt already know about tho several organs were swollen (liver and spleen) and other then that all seemed to look pretty good. </div><div><br /></div><div>the hospital food was terrible and i swear if another hospital tries to force me to eat rubbery jello one more time...ill...ill...do something! lol...i was gonna say throw up but thatll only keep you in the pin longer so i wont do that lol...ill figure something out tho. well...anyways...i end up going back to the ranch later that day and end up working the next day (just not in the kitchen). im weak, im tired and im told i cant ride horses or lift anything heavy because my liver and spleen were so swollen that i could bust em at anytime and they didnt want me doing anything that could do that...and personally i didnt wanna die so i listened. </div><div><br /></div><div>thankfully im alive and well now...and sadly that was what it took to turn my summer around...to put a smile on my face and definitely prepare me for the return to utah...i couldnt wait and honestly now that im here...im grateful for the experience but i wouldnt go back to the ranch to work. </div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-69701255444013402472010-07-14T13:42:00.001-06:002010-07-14T13:44:51.834-06:00Love. Life. Laughter….while in a small town ER<p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:center"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family:"AR CENA""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px; font-size: 16px; ">Its sad that a hospital visit is what it takes to get the ME back that ive wanted. But well…that’s what happens when youre in a very small town hospital with literally nothing better to do than sit and stare out the huge window across the room and look at a trailer park. Yes that’s right…a trailer park.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">Now let me explain to you some of the happenings before I got to view this lovely scenery for almost 24 hours. …<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">I got sick. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">Lol…ok ill give ya more than that lol..my head was congested…I had the entire body fever…chills and (for lack of a better term) hot flashes…nausea when eating…I was a disaster (and yes this part Does relate to the whole story) and in two days went to the bathroom a total of<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>3 times. Tmi. I know oh well. Too late to take it back hehe. Ultimately I was taken to the hospital Tuesday evening and was hooked up to an iv with morphine..sound familiar? I had a fever of 102.5 and my white blood cell count was 25.9 (they like it between 5 and 10). Then once they determined it wasn’t mono they gave me some meds to actually make me feel better. That night I believe I was stabbed 3-4 times with needles (for bood and then the iv)…this too is important. Once I finish every drop in the saline iv bag…the nurse was adamant I get every drop. Ive personally never seen someone stand there and tilt the bag until it was empty…ya..it happened. My temp when I left was still over 100. So once that is complete I head home…try and eat some simple foods and take my meds (augmentin tastes terrible. I kid you not. Even when you don’t cut that horsepill in half its terrible. Im sitting here tasting it from when I took it last night. Ya…*shudder* vicodin…now there is another drug to give you the chills. When the doc said she was sending me home with vicodin I think my jaw actually dropped. Vicodin is what House is addicted to on House md. …this is serious narcotics).<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I take the augmentin, the 2 vicodins, and 4 200 ibuprofens as instructed to do by the doctor…extreme? I say yes. Went to bed. Woke up, felt nauseous, spat some gunk out in the toilet and promptly fell asleep leaning on the toilet bowl…2 hours later…what came up was black. Now this is where reading too much and being too educated can psych you out…one of my favorite books I read over and over is called the hot zone…it’s about the origin and outbreaks of the Marburg and then the ebola virus. “what hiv can do to a person in 7 years…ebola can do that in 7 days.” Its nasty nasty stuff and I have no clue why I love reading that book…but I do. One of the things tho is that ebola literally turns everything to mush inside and you puke black stuff within other stuff..coffee grounds is what it looks like fyi lol (and yes when I told the doc it was black, she asked if it looked like coffee grounds…it kinda did…) but anyways…no I don’t have ebola…no im not gonna die lol…but it was just kinda funny to me. I skipped my morning dosage of pills and slept and slept and slept. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">Emily woke me up when she brought my saddle that had just been delivered…oh. Well…surprise! I bought a saddle. Ya..i know what youre prolly thinkin…a saddle? You work on a ranch! Are there not plenty of saddles? Why did you need to buy one? Theres not enough room to store your saddle anywhere is there…and how much do saddles cost huh? Well. Let me lay it out for ya…I bought the saddle 3<sup>rd</sup> hand off blonde Emily here. Its an all purpose that was mainly used for barrels for quite some time. It’s an original circle y saddle with the acorn pattern detailed into the leather. The seat is roughed leather and is a lighter color than the rest of the saddle. Its in great condition and is a size 14 seat…it’s a near perfect fit and once im in the saddle on a horse, we’ll see if I like it even better…which im sure I will. Granted the saddle is built for a quarter horse build but that can be dealt with easily. Brand new saddles start at a thousand dollars…better quality are more expensive obviously. Now the ranch has this deal with a saddle company…you tell us what you want in a saddle (size, design, buckin rolls, cantle, tree, skirt…everything) and you get it half off from what we would normally sell it for and you can get it within a matter of days…(because they just throw the pieces together and voila you have your saddle). JR, one of the wranglers did that and payed $660 for his. What I spent was $330 for a saddle in great condition with a breast collar and shipping. If I want buckin rolls, I can get some later on down the road. I figure that I can spend 300 on a saddle that does everything I need it to and as long as I take care of it and keep it soaped and oiled, I can have this saddle basically forever. Plus, my major and what I want to do in life kinda demands I have some equipment. And having a saddle so I don’t have to rush to grab in horsemanship cause it’s the only one that fits me would be amazing and I won’t have to worry about stirrup length cause I already have it set to exactly how I like it. So there. I bought a saddle and I love it. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">Promptly after em left the room…my next porcelain bowl encounter was a green one. Disgustingly green…called the doc up and asked if they thought I should come in…basically the answer was no. so Kirsten went and picked up my prescription and picked up a bottle of anti-nausea medicine. I took some of that, took my meds, had a little bit of light food (or so I thought) and about an hour later it came up too. After this final red experience I called the hospital…they agreed it wasnt working and to come in. they had saved a spot for me (small hospitals can only hold so many). <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "AR CENA"">Pause here…im done writing and so hopefully theres a second part to this lol<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'AR CENA';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px;">and comment from blonde emily today referring to someone we work with..."i hope she gets eaten by an armadillo!" ...oh brother!</span></span></p>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-87722734261856284642010-07-14T13:41:00.003-06:002010-07-14T13:49:50.684-06:00the things you think about when cleaning....<p class="MsoNormal">(written forever ago and saved for when i actually get to the library) </p><p class="MsoNormal">Working here at the ranch you have a lot of time to think over many many many things…incessantly. So here are some of my realizations laid out for others to know. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Ive realized I have a compulsive disorder…I count things. Not so much things, but rather chimes and bells tolling. It was something I did at home when our cuckoo clock chimed. I would count the tolls…and if I didn’t start at the first one I would just jump in and count from the middle. Having bells here for meals (2 per meal) I find myself counting them even when I don’t want to. Its honestly rather ridiculous but I suppose I could be way more crazy than I already am. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">You are an alcoholic when you flinch when someone spills a drop of their drink and when you lick the side of your cup to get that last drop of a shot that got away from you. This ive witnessed…</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Having an inner need to please people can seriously backfire on you. Lessons are learned that you don’t have to please everyone…and that definitely includes pleasing others. As long as you are pleased with yourself and heavenly father can be pleased with you then you are doing something right. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Im someone that needs human contact. I need my touch senses worked and frequently. I don’t mean in an inappropriate way…just I need hugs. I need a hand to hold. A lap to curl up next to, arms to fall into. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">People read my blog. I know this for a fact. Thing is there are people that read this and then email me with snide remarks and slaps in the face. Here is another fun fact for the day about me…don’t freakin send me the email or any other form of communication because I don’t freaking care! I don’t want it! </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Dear step dad. You are a douche. When I was little I wanted to be like you. I wanted to be cool and fly a helicopter…Im apparently too short. Even in high school I asked recruiters if I was too short…they turned me down. No I may have never said it but I liked you. I appreciated you and all that you had done for not just me but for my mom…you took us both in…loved and cared for us. Supported us and helped me when I wanted and needed it. no I never said thank you enough. Love and emotions weren’t expressed in the house…why did you expect me to hug and kiss you and tell I loved you before you deployed if we never ever did that in the first place? I loved that truck more than anything else I owned (used)…the day I totaled it I promise you my first thought was “man…im so dead.” And trust me…you think I just shrugged the accident off without anything? First off…I cried for my truck…not for the “freedom” I had lost but for the truck…the fact it wasn’t really mine…the money…the symbolism of the truck…and all the work and time that had been put into it. I appreciated you teaching me how to work on it. I appreciated how you set aside money for me for school…how you planned and tried to help guide me towards anything but diggin ditches and flippin burgers.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>….now here I am and mom has come to me at times to vent…to cry…to forewarn me about the fact that you will no longer be paying my tuition with all that money you’ve saved since I was taken under your wing. Im graduating early because of you. I have to…mom cant pay for it and after all those talks of finances <span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>with you..well…I don’t want student loans. I may not be living the life you wanted for me…but as a whole im happy and healthy and standing on my feet. Now here is another thing….i appreciate the fact that for so many years you have cared for, loved, and supported my mom as far as I can see….as of right now? I couldn’t care less if you stayed in Iraq or Afghanistan. The way you are acting and behaving is hurting my mom and I wont stand for it. Quit being a puss and grow up. For goodness sakes youre almost 53 years old. Act like a man with a wife and 3 kids to support…and honestly if you don’t wanna have a thing to do with me…for the most part, that’s fine as long as you put a face on when I show up for moms sake. Support the other two…equally. Tye is your son. Honor is your daughter. Ben is dead and trying to make tye the boy you wanted ben to be is tough luck. Love tye for who he is and how he is. He is a smart boy and is most certainly old enough to make decisions for himself. Don’t push him. He’s stubborn and will push back and wont learn a thing at all. <span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>And that means church and religion and scouts. Honor is honor and given the proper…and I do mean proper guidance and support will be just fine in life. Give her the optimal chance at a normal life and do what is right for her. With mom, honor has come so very far from where she started. Let it stay that way. Consult mom. Don’t go behind her back. Love her. Trust her. She is loyal to you. She loves you. Me? I could prolly care less what happens to you because of the way that you have treated my mom lately…and my siblings. For moms sake tho, do right by her please and treat all the family with respect please. I looked up to you once. I wanted a husband like you once. Now? What I want in a husband and father of my kids is nothing like how you are now. Cherish my mother please. Treat her with the respect she deserves. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Mom keeps telling me that she likes woody. That she wants me to convince him Nauvoo is the place to get married in. she thinks we would work well together in the long run. I agree but I don’t say that out<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>loud too much. It’s a touchy topic. Its usually tiptoed over…something only subtly mentioned. Honestly thinking about marriage is scary. I start thinking about my age…im 19. The absolute I would be proposed to I figure would be 20 which means I could be married before I even hit 21. Its scary!! But then I sit and think I could do it and it would be ok. But then the fact that im ok with it is scary and I flip out all over again. Im retarded honestly. I just need to chill. Woody wont propose for forever. I know him well enough to know that for sure….i think. Sometimes I freak because he says something and ill think that im wrong and that he’s ready. Im not ready. Im not. Sure I mean I could be a wife I suppose. I could share the cooking lol with him since he is a good cook…ok hes pretty great…and I honestly wrote the great part cause I knew if he was reading this over my shoulder that he would say something about being only a good cook….cause he and I both know he is pretty dang great…in more ways that one. I love him and I could be his wife….i just freak out cause I still see myself as a college kid…not married and in college lol…I mean I know it happens, especially in utah but…that just isn’t us. Ah well…</p>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-25752418258738773012010-06-24T13:16:00.002-06:002010-06-24T14:05:13.286-06:00life...and the things that go with..here i am in parshall colorado and i am surrounded by beauty and green for the most part. i love the little towns around me and dont feel the need for a big city. even with all this? i miss utah. never ever ever growing up did i ever think i would say that...<br /><br />"i dont want to go to utah. i wont live there ever! there are too many mormons!" ...i want to go home to utah lol. i miss it. since being here the trivial things have honestly melted away. high school friends? i dont really miss them. college friends?for the most part, i dont miss them much either.<br /><br />its the important things in life you think about (especially when you clean and work all day). i think about woody. about my family. about his family. about classes and credits. about my apartment and hoping i dont have to drop much money on it. i think about my future...the career i want, my goals in life. i worry about money.<br /><br />the hardest decision i think i have right now in my life tho is whether or not to purchase a saddle from one of the girls here. its a versatile saddle and what with my plans and such ill need one soon.<br /><br />housekeeping......i have almost become a nazi about bathrooms. i honestly prefer the bathrooms over the bedrooms and lets just say when someone comes in and messe it up or i find out someone didnt do it right...i flip. im sorry that other people want to get done asap...i completely understand. i want the same thing but finishing an hour early (and we are being paid for that hour off) and doing a half done job is ridiculous!! it takes 2 mins to fix the little things that are being left undone. im not asking for perfection...i just see that you have the time...(and are getting the money) to straighten the towels...make sure there are extra supplies in the cabinet...check note of needs in each cabin...pick rugs up to sweep stuff out from under them. working with people that dont do the job is draining on me. i know its life but come on people...i hate having to go around after you and fixing what youre not doing!!<br /><br />PI attendence has ceased for me...after hours is spent watching criminal minds with emily or heading to the arena (the ropin' pen) in granby. i want to rope. i want to chase cans...(barrel race).<br /><br />honestly right now i want to get away from the ranch. i need that break. im tired...im trying not to grump at people...but puttin on a face for the guests does take its toll. when i can ill just escape to the sick pen and brush and pet strawberry shortcake (shorty).<br /><br />mosquitoes are vicious and are hard to kill this season...i dont know how many times ive smacked mosquitoes and they just keep on truckin...and they swarm ya in the middle of the day in high country with no water and wind. no bueno.<br /><br />sure the week flies by but as a whole the season end just seems far off. i just want to spend my days in the saddle and at the barn.<br /><br />my hats are dusty and dirty and a little curled at the ends. my boots need new soles. my sshirts are dirty and no amount of scrubbin gets the dirt out from under the nails until you pull the pocket knife outof the back pocket. days are hot and nights are layering weather (tanktop, long sleeves, vest, jacket, and then a wind and rain proof coat. pants are dusty, dirty, stained,and frayed. things that are on the list to buy eventually included spurs and the straps. a martingale and headstall and reins. a saddle blanket will be needed once that saddle comes in. its almost too bad i cant just have a horse and ride that to classes....ah well..that would be the best!<br /><br />completely new topic...<br />mom yesterday was saying how she thinks woody and i would work well together. (im sure woody gets things like that on his end from people). "he could build the barn you would need and you would be able to tell him what would work best and what you would want for the horses...and you could help him do it."<br /><br />and this next one i promise all ive ever mentioned to her was that when he gets married he wants to get married in the hawaiian temple...lol...it came up in a convo ok? lol. well since i was younger ive wanted to get married in the nauvoo temple (actually more like since that moment i walked into that temple) so mom keeps telling me and i need to try to talk him into nauvoo....well madre? my fiance and i will descuss marriage location but since im not engaged and therefore have no fiance im not going into that convo. ugh. thanks mom.<br /><br />knots are still present under my surgery scars. hands are no longer nie and pretty...my wrists are strong and sitting is a limited luxury...i love it here but i cant wait to get back to cedar. im looking forward to seeing woody next week!!<br />fin for now*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-3943699868159082172010-06-09T13:20:00.002-06:002010-06-09T13:57:57.865-06:00life as i know it herehonest to goodness this is the longest time ive been on the computer in forever. sadly mine is broken and cant do what i want it to...ugh.<br /><br />so ive been here at the ranch for a month now. time sure has flown by. since getting here it has snowed. its hailed. its flooded...(under 3 flood warnings the other day and a tornado watch...) its absolutely gorgeous here though. another summary of what has been going on...more PI nights. went to the rodeo. had a banana in my ear, my face, and my back pocket...ive been out riding a dew times and well...lets just say the horses make it interesting sometimes. example: going down a hill yesterday the horse i was on decide to buck and kick the horse behind us...great horse though. she and i got a lot done yesterday on the trail. in the beginning she doesnt want to listen to what im telling her but after a while if i asked her to walk off on her own away from the other horses she would listen...and she neck reined some yesterday...<br /><br />so many things i sit and think of during the week but i just never write it down to upload when i get the chance...ugh. lots of time to think on the ranch...i thought i would have a butt load to say but i dont. im sorry...so many funny things, silly things, beautiful things, etc and i just...they dont get written down.<br /><br />well here are some thoughts i guess...i dont miss people back home in tennessee. sure there is a handful of people that i miss but people from school? old friends? not really. i miss the land and countryside more than anything. cedar city? i miss people there. miss the roomies now and then but as far as missing everyone there? not really. of course there is someone there i miss terribly but thats cause i love him lol and miss him.<br /><br />hopefully mom gets the chance to come out to the ranch within the next few weeks and be able to bring honor. that would be awesome. i miss the little munchkin (who isnt so little anymore).<br /><br />im going to have a compulsive disorder to clean bathrooms, kitchens, fold towels, fold the point (sacred point hahaha) on the toilet paper roll. so everyone...beware. and never. and i mean <span style="font-weight: bold;">never</span> will i have a bed skirt on any bed in the house ill live in. ill just buy a big blanket or quilt to cover it up if i have to. i refuse to have bedskirts.<br /><br />bleach and 409 are prolly permanently soaked into my skin. ive gotten bleach on my hands (it burns) and bleach in one of my eyes (<span style="font-weight: bold;">that burns</span>). the kitchen is a pretty fun place tho. im still singing and dancin in there and now and then drop a jug of ranch dressing on the floor so that it explodes on me and the floor, walls, coffee maker...everything. the cook got a kick out of the time i was standing on the kitchen counter to get the leverage i needed to put the juice machine back together and when i accomplished my job stood up fast and did a celebratory fist pump (yes i really did). in the process of this moment i ended up hitting my head on the ceiling. it was classic.<br /><br />my accent has gotten increasingly worse. some words woody and mom cant understand. sometimes i say something out loud and laugh at myself because it sounds so bad. example: i was saying the words "better than them" but it came out "better n em."<br /><br />as far as food goes you never have to worry about going hungry...leftovers go on the crew shelf for us to devour at anytime during the day or night.monday is steak and shrimp. tuesday is fried chicken. wednesday is porkchop or stuffed duck and well......i dont have the menu memorized lol...but its definitely full meals...which i miss half the time cause im either serving em or working elsewhere.<br /><br />ive started watching criminal minds at night with blonde emily instead of hittin up the PI. figure im just getting soooo hungover on my 1 rootbeer while emily is trashed with her H2O on the rocks...(classic i know).<br /><br />well anyways im just gonna head out. ill have to write things down as i go i guess if my comp will ever let me do that. peace love and fin.*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-89410035754556882322010-05-29T15:40:00.002-06:002010-05-29T16:02:10.855-06:00ranch adventuresaka...nights at the bar. saloon girl nights. boots 24/7. drama drama drama. no water. no hot water. laughs. jokes. hanging with drowsy water folks. bleach water. lemon oil. runaway jeeps with no brakes thats 80 years old. getting excited over rodeo night. falling in love with big bertha (the dryer). knives in back pockets. toothpicks always needed.<div><br /></div><div>quote of the day:</div><div>--"if you too could just have a pillow fight and then kiss after that...that would be awesome!"</div><div>--"if you can get me some chocolate pie and then have chocolate chip cookies for me tomorrow u can be my new ex-wife!"</div><div>--"this here is miss tennessee" "really?!" "...yes" "thats so awesome! thats such an accomplishment!! what was your talent?" "...singing" (yes the person believed me...)</div><div>--"snow rain" aka sleet</div><div>--"need help getting it up there?"</div><div><br /><div><br /></div><div>people here at the ranch working:</div><div>brandon-texas...wrangler, maintenance</div><div>alex (girl)- oklahoma...wrangler</div><div>jared-indiana...asst chef</div><div>denton (D or Double D)- new mexico...wrangler</div><div>emily k (EM)- michigan...crew</div><div>JR- arizona...kids wrangler</div><div>will- south carolina...kids counselor</div><div>maya- wisconsin...wrangler</div><div>emily n- north carolina...lodge hostess</div><div>corrine- pennsylvania and colorado...crew and my roomie</div><div>kirsten- wisconsin...wrangler</div><div>jerymiah- idaho...head wrangler</div><div>shilo- idaho...head kids coordinator (and married to jerymiah)</div><div>alex (guy)- colorado/texas...maintenance</div><div>eddie- south carolina?...head chef</div><div><br /></div><div>and em and i are off...we have to go but real adventures shall be in store lol...and pictures will be added to. i promise. take care and ill be back maybe sometime next week with hopefully lots more time</div></div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-71822113888013722462010-05-20T16:09:00.003-06:002010-05-20T16:54:09.365-06:00why yes i HAVE fallen off the face of the earthfirst off. <div>im in colorado working on a dude ranch. my days include long hours and lots of moving around. is it my preferred choice of jobs on the ranch? nope. not even close. do i get college credit? why yes thank...that would make it better. plus the scenery...the guests for the most part...the weddings. no...not mine. chill out. there are several wedding going on this summer and one has a neat surprise...but so that i dont jinx it im not gonna reveal what it is. ill tell you after the fact with pictures to prove it most definitely if it does in fact happen....mysterious huh? </div><div><br /></div><div>after exams i moved outa my dorm with the help of woody (and yes thats where the stuff i didnt throw away or take with me to CO is at...). because of stupid shuttles, woody drove me to the vegas airport (and no im not complaining about the additional time spent with him. not even close lol) barely made the flight (i used my medical excuses as reason to get a wheelchair and to make the flight lol). go to tennessee and its hot and humid. yuck. rain rain rain...yall heard about it. well the cumberland river in clarksville rose higher than than what hit nashville...interstates were shut down, etc. make it to the airport to leave tn and fly into vegas...woody picks me up and he and i stroll the strip for the afternoon. we walked that sucker 2.5 times...and it was HOT. we get back to st george and the next day drive to cedar and pack my stuff in the vue. after we were all ready we stopped in moab to see the delicate arch (gorgeous and quite fun i must say!) oh the adventures driving through utah...it really was fun and i have proof that a certain someone sings while driving :) we pull into the ranch late that night and go to bed. next day we just chill and i unpack cause i have to work the next day. (i had tons of surprises from woody and one of them? the belt buckle i havent taken off yet. i love it! thank you!) he got some in the vue for the drive back... (if he found them lol).</div><div><br /></div><div>work work work. thats how life has been since i got here...which isnt bad. it keeps my mind off of things and i dont mind the constant moving (until my feet hurt though). my job is crew. i "housekeep" the cabins and waitress some meals (depending on the day) and do laundry. sadly my busiest day is sunday which makes this summer hard for me. i really needed that and ugh. on that topic im not the only LDS member here. a kids wrangler and the head wrangler and his wife are LDS and i absolutely adore the head wrangler and his wife. great people. most of the crew is here and more to come later today and next week. </div><div><br /></div><div>next week tammy and chad will be here helping with opening week and itll be great to see them. which......everyone that knows tammy usually says that i look like her and have the same facial expressions and sound like her sometimes in my voice...lolfor the ease of being me i dont introduce myself as the sister of tammy...im just rachel. but...i have no problem with claiming her as family ;)</div><div><br /></div><div>it has rained. it has hailed. it has snowed. it has been hot and sunny. it has been cold and windy. welcome to the bar lazy j folks! my daily wear includes some for of boots (either cowboy or rubber). my now favorite carhartt jeans and i button up shirt tucked into the pants with a nice belt buckle and either my cowboy hat baseball cap. my hands are constantly dirty and showers are required daily. </div><div><br /></div><div>honestly i shower in the bunkhouse (better water pressure and more hot water). spare time is spent in the bunkhouse with everyone and long nights usually consist of many quotes, lots of laughs, raiding fridges, and a beer fridge being empty and sometimes a few hours at the local watering hole. multiple movies are watched in a night. bears are avoided when walking around places at night. </div><div><br /></div><div>no cell phone signal. definitely no wi-fi. just clear skies, fun people, beautiful scenery, smell of horses, starry nights, blue jeans, and boots. those are things i enjoy out here. </div><div><br /></div><div>my last trip to the PI (the local watering hole) involved me getting 2 phone numbers lol. im hoping the guy and his family can get me up on some of their horses and teach me how to barrel race (on barrel racing horses) and rope. i get time of some days and a whole day off on others so im hoping that i can fit that in this summer cause i sure would enjoy that. </div><div><br /></div><div>well farewell til later. my ride has to be back to waitress dinner. enjoy this...and know that im still alive in lil old parshall, CO.</div><div><br /></div><div>quote is appropriate to repeat:</div><div>"whats cookin good lookin?!"</div><div>and i am not rachel...im referred to as "shorty" or "shortstack"</div><div><br /></div><div>fin.</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-13315564372600986432010-04-28T10:25:00.004-06:002010-04-28T14:30:19.192-06:00st george bday party dosi waddle. no i havent always waddled...i realized this yesterday...now let me explain. i believe it was because i was wearing jeans yesterday...which was the first day i had done such a thing since the surgery...the waddling was so that i didnt rub against the zipper and button. needless to say woody thought it fit perfectly with the whole prego belly thing. ...glad he got a kick out of it. so the result of this realization? im not wearing pants until i have to. skirts, dresses, and shorts only. <div><br /></div><div>two exams yesterday...wish i could say they went stellar. that would be a lie. math exam? not even going to say a word about it. history exam? i was late and still finished confidently before others...just a regular test over the WWII-Vietnam era...not bad at all. got ready for the day, went with woody to his place...he made the pancakes this time...yes he can cook and yes its good and yummy. to give you an idea of how my stomach has shrunk lately...two pancakes (small-med size) plus a cup of juice and i was stuffed. i finished it all like a good girl since i knew finishing the juice would not be good with my dehydration record...ah well. stopped by the sig house on the way to st george to drop off a screw driver so one of the guys could break into his car. i was asked why i was barefoot "i have tennessee foot" ..."whats that?" "walk around barefoot" "...oh" (i think i single handedly just ruined all the work of unhickafying the south and tennessee specifically with that convo). </div><div><br /></div><div>we stopped at a gas station on the way to st george and as we're sitting there a guy wearing a face mask and goggles driving something similar to a rhino parks in front of the store...the vehicle was registered like a car people. license plate...etc. now <b>that</b> was a new one. oh...and the noses on the new dodges? i approve. it kinda reminds me of a shark nose...angles forward with a slight hump right behind it. speaking of sharks...so my roomie carlie had to write a story in english...it was a world domination expo was what it turned out to be. it was her plan to take over the world and each roomie had a part. guess what i was?! ...the slave. lol. so the other day she added a part to it...the shanda!! what is a shanda you ask? it is a shark-panda hybrid! also known as the park. incredibly cute and dangerous. (from what we know anyways-one has never been successfully born at our facilities). this is what ive lived with for the last year...and sadly? im not staying with them next year...</div><div><br /></div><div>drop my laundry off at his parents house (hey his sheets were in there too) and we head to jolleys ranchwear outlet...everything was going. they were shutting down by saturday. prices listed were not what they were going for. there was a rack of $1 shirts and shorts. all the womens jeans that had been $60 that had gone for $15 were gone sadly. boots were thin and few between. two MHT premium felt hats left. $1 baseball caps. what did i get you ask? over $200 boulet boots got all the way down to $75. for giggles i tried on one of the MHT felt hats. lo and behold it fit! kid you not. this thing is a $200 hat...got it for $70. and yes i looked at the $1 baseball caps. there on the pile was a trucker hat with carhartt on it. ...yes. i thought about getting it. upon telling woody that he says, "you still surprise me sometimes." woody didnt get out of the store without buying anything either lol...he got some cowboy up cowboy boots (they look good on him if i do say so myself) and some work boots that he finds exceptionally comfy and again lol look good. after damaging our bank accounts we went looking for a birthday card for bridget...found a great one but there was this one we didnt get. "look! i got you a scratch and sniff card! ...scratch here. *scratch...nothing. open the card* smells like a birthday card doesnt it?" ...nice. </div><div><br /></div><div>got a call from madre after woody and i got back...she read me some bits from the email from dad. lets just say...i need to finish school fast and make lots of money and not spend anything. i need the scholarships and may change from the apartments i applied for to a sister apartment by the same people thats a little cheaper though its twice the distance from the school...i can count how many times ive seen or heard my mom cry on one hand and well...this added to it. i wish i was home for her...again i can count on one hand how many times "i love you" has been said between her and as the phone call ends i say "i love you mom" ..."i love you too baby." i lost it. i was glad i had walked into the garage cause i lost it. tears down the face...dried my face off, dried the eyelashes and walked back in...on with the night<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>dinner? straight from home moms kitchen it seems. no joke...the pasta dish? really similar to one of my favorite dishes mom does (spaghetti a la carbanara). noodles, bacon, spinich, olives, egg, parmesan, olive oil, garlic....both were equally delicious. garlic bread...yum. and then there it was...tomatoes and mozzarella with basil on top. im not quite sure what was put on it...i just know it was good. i had seconds. again something we would make back home...(and i admit that before we left i ate like half the box of it that was in the fridge...i was craving it ok?) the cake? the best part was just trying to light the candles...they melted super fast and literally drowned themselves and got wax all over the cake...it was priceless. lots of laughs and such going around the table. afterwards i finished up my laundry while my blog was being read by certain individuals at the table ;) and then a certain blog was shown to me...at least this time that evening i could hold the tears at that point where they didnt fall down the cheeks...</div><div><br /></div><div>woody was driving the motorcycle back to cedar since it had warmed up enough consistently that he was willing to have it out of storage...that meant i had the truck. now i follow people well. i dont lose em cause of how i drive plus i pick vehicles out and i dont lose em even if they are ahead of me. i dont like being behind motorcycles so the order of just stay behind me? ugh. oh plus im driving with brights on the whole time so we dont have to worry about being pulled over by the crazy cops again. i had drivers ed....ive seen the pics...the videos. im sorry...i do <b>not</b> want that to happen to woody. i mean i know he pays attention and watches out for everyone else on the road but still....i could not stand to see something happen to him...on top of that? last spring..i was driving towards town and say something i wont ever forget. there was an accident...happened as i got close and *shudder* i saw him die. a guy on a motorcycle t-boned a car at 60+ mph. shoes fly. people trying to save him. all because the car didnt see him and turned in front of him. and once on the freeway im supposed to follow him but there was no consistency in the speed lol...ah well...got home safe. thats what matters right? </div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-5860212990297540302010-04-26T18:25:00.003-06:002010-04-26T19:59:18.056-06:00the pregnant crack addict in the cornerfirst off. <div>i can move! not to say i couldnt before, but i can walk upright, run, jump, climb, dance, cough, hiccup, etc all without pain. its a lovely thing to be sure. granted i have a searing headache almost 24/7 and aspirin and water doesnt help much with it but i think thats because the antibiotics tell me to avoid all light...sunglasses are definitely helpful. </div><div><br /></div><div>sheri dew came and spoke saturday morning...i got there late and was assisted down the stairs and to my seat since i was still a bit ify walking and doing stairs that day...(yes i got tired going <b>down</b> the stairs. it happens ok? needless to stay climbing back up em was not fun). sat front and center...and when i say that i mean second row, center aisle seat. ya. way cool and good speech.</div><div>after that, grabbed some breakfast with woody and then later that afternoon (after ensuring i was drugged) headed to a lunch thing up in enoch(?) for the engineering majors. an hour drive to a ranch...beautiful. i only had a bite of the yummy buffalo burger (i cant stuff myself...it hurts). ok. so there was this bull....his hips? taller than me. this guy was gigundo! i could curl up in a ball and prolly would have fit in his skull. way huge bull. had a curly haired forehead...all white. slapping the bull was suggested to several people...no one did it. prolly cause even if the guy made it through the fence...after just a few times of running into the metal railing, im sure the bull wouldve gotten through too. "go ahead...itll give the biggest adrenaline rush ever. plus there's a clinic in panguitch. we've been there before"</div><div><br /></div><div>there was this one game...woody called it "golf" ...not the way ive ever played golf lol. two balls on a string with a thing you try to catch them on for points...anyways it was fun. a ladies man of a little kid running around...sigh. ill broach that topic later.there was a cute brindle boxer pup running around....ah to have a boxer. i like em...definitely want natural ears...and if possible a natural tail would be nice too. though...i definitely like the mini schnauzer we have back home. she's a sweetheart...the only lady in the family with a beautiful full mustache and beard. all black (though she's what...5? and already graying out) and spunky...natural ears and just a great dog. ...alright so not too long ago i decided that when i have a ranch i want rhodesian ridgebacks for my ranch dog. hands down. say im out on a ride or something...this dog was bred to run alongside horses for miles and miles and miles. bonus? they were bred to fight lions...thats a dog i want at my side if i ever run into trouble on the trail or anything that could cause problems...mountain lions, bears, etc. plus a great family dog...great with kids and just good dogs. idk. just a breed i want lol.</div><div><br /></div><div>k so enough tangents...story time...hehehe</div><div>so sunday...oh boy. didnt get to my ward...went with woody. let me pause here and say that my belly is still swollen from surgery, the CO2, bruising, and such...aka i have a prego looking belly. i have needle marks and bruising around it from the IVs and blood tests. i look like a crack addict. ...so here i am sitting in the front of the church with woody looking like a pregnant crack addict. great. oh it gets better lol...announcement time from the church...announcing of the newly moved in members</div><div>"we would like to welcome rachel ann woodbury!"</div><div>...let me pause here for everyone. my name is rachel ann. woody's last name is woodbury. awkward. so when he hears rachel ann he looks at me and im looking at him and do a fast swivel to see if anyone stands up. when he hears woodbury he looks to see who the new girl is......too bad no one stood up...ya. weird. so i get to relief society and the girl that gave a talk during sacrament sits next to me and asks if im woodys sister or something...uhm..no. im the girlfriend. *pause* ...i ask if she asked because of the announcement in sacrament. she said yes and i laughed and explained the whole rachel ann woodbury thing...needless to say she laughed and thought that was a little weird. </div><div>later he was walking with me to my room and he goes "you know my last girlfriend went crazy...and here you are already changing your last name!" </div><div>"it wasnt me i swear!"</div><div>"man...i havent even proposed and youre already changing it...i dont know if i can do this! *big grin*.."</div><div>.....(for the record even though no one stood up in church i swear it was <b>not</b> me)</div><div>we walk a little further and he stops me. </div><div>"you know what tho? rachel ann woodbury rolls off the tongue really well...*smile*..."</div><div>sigh...</div><div><br /></div><div>oh. well...can i just say real fast that im gonna miss him over the summer? majorly. ugh. plans have already been made for a camping trip once i get back in town. i cant wait. cant wait to be back. cant wait to see him..which...</div><div>...people ask when the wedding is...when im getting a ring...that i better send them an invite... i wish they would chill. i wanna smack em and be like..."im not worried about it. i dont think about it...why do you care?" i guess cause its utah that has something to do with it but ...guys..i <b>just</b> got out of a 15 month relationship just 3 months ago. i was engaged. i had the ring on the finger. obviously that fell through. im in no rush to get married or engaged for that matter. guaranteed i wont be married before 20 and yes, i live in utah and yes im fine with that. </div><div>...and i guess from this topic i can jump to one i said i would cover earlier: kids. love em to death. ive mentioned the maternal instinct..i love playin with them. i have no problems with spit-up, throw-up, diapers...been there done it all. lets say i see no kids but i hear em...the attention (of listening) goes to the kids or babies. a cry or scream elicits a glance to make sure everything is ok...thats just how i am. honestly? cant wait til i have my own. (they better be little cause after this last surgery i refuse to have a c-section. its the maternal thing again...i have to be well so that i can protect them...care for them). there will also be no epidurals. not happening. sorry. youre not sticking a needle in my spine. with the news my uterus is in a weird place plus just a deep secret fear that i cant or wont be able to have kids...*shiver* mom says mine is just like hers...near the spine and she had 4 kids so it eases the fear a lot but still... and ok so yes, i was one of the girls that had at least one name picked out years ago... k for the first time publicly i will reveal them lol. (sorry im in a weird mood). girl: lily margaret -margaret comes from my grandma edwards...something for her since i looked up to her as a little girl even if i didnt see her much. boy: aiden james -first name is definitely available to change but honest to goodness the name james grabbed my attention a few years ago and its just stuck around.</div><div><br /></div><div>k...subject change. finally got my stuff from the ex. didnt get everything of course. got my clothes but uh..no yearbook. it was interesting for woody to be standing there next to me when i opened up the box...anywats (and yes i meant to put a t instead of a y thank you). </div><div><br /></div><div>packing is coming along nicely...everything is going to 4 different places: home, colorado, woodys place (including the bike), and DI (or trash). ...lots to sort through and get done. studying? hate it. 2 finals tomorrow, 1 wednesday, and 2 thursday. oh! oh! so tomorrow, heading to st george...gonna hit up the jolley ranchwear store thats going outa business! cant wait lol. on to the birthday dinner (happy birfday bridget!!) then driving the truck back to cedar solo. </div><div><br /></div><div>checking out of the dorms thursday morning...leaving cedar thursday afternoon to go to st george. las vegas friday to fly home...home just in time for my sisters bday...cant wait. hahaha...so i told woody "drats! i wont be able to pick up my sister when i get home!" (doc's orders of no lifting anything over 25lbs for the next 2 weeks). his response..."wait, how old is she?" </div><div>"she's turning 10...*laugh*.."</div><div>"isnt that a good thing?! she's prolly almost as big as you!"</div><div>"well ya, she's almost as tall as me...but she's only like 60 some lbs..."</div><div>...he just shook his head lol.</div><div><br /></div><div>ok. this is ridiculously long enough...sorry. lots of rambling this time. peace!</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-15336125477593984672010-04-24T07:05:00.003-06:002010-04-24T07:51:25.874-06:00selflessness. trust. love...selflessness.<div>growing up i was never thought to be a selfless child. i was told i was selfish and cared nothing about others. sigh...if only you could have gotten into my head as a kid. <div><br /></div><div>you say i took too long to order food at a fast food restaurant. i was being told to get whatever i want but i never did. i fought myself inside to pick the cheap food. everytime. if there were two different things that i thought i might want to eat...i choose the cheapest one everytime. not to purposely look like a cheapskate kid but because i didnt want to be a bother. i didnt want people spending money on me. </div><div><br /></div><div>i picked the cheap shoes to like. my tomboyish ways helped...i didnt have to ask mom to buy frilly shirts or dresses. no make-up. jewelry? yeah right. </div><div><br /></div><div>as i got older i became more "selfish." i would get in trouble because i would come home late. i would be late because i would be helping a friend out. </div><div><br /></div><div>dad would be gone overseas and mom would be busy with everything. i did so much to raise my little sister. i was...what 9 when she was born? over the next 2-3 years i became her translator. her comfort when something happened. her almost everything. there were times she would slip and call me mom. when i had my truck...if she was given the choice between a ride with me in my truck or a ride with mom in the car...she chose me every time. she still comes to me. the time, effort, love, the everything ive put into her...thats time ive taken away from something i could have been doing for more "selfish" reasons. </div><div><br /></div><div>the guys ive dated or been with...i often gave more then i ever received in return. almost always. the last guy i dated....the one i was engaged to...even til the end i sacrificed so much for his wishes. all last semester of school i avoided social activities like the plague. i skipped out on dances (a passion of mine). absolutely no parties. nothing to do with fraternities (opps...) no hangin out with guys in general...and that one? thankfully impossible. i was in rotc and had my testosterone fix that way (i grew up hanging with guys...cant stop that). anything deemed wrong was a huge fight. stress. and time and time again...i would give in. selfish? ya right. </div><div><br /></div><div>not to have this be me parading around going look at this! look at this!....this is me letting it out. </div><div><br /></div><div>everything ive done for my friends in the last few months...helping them out...anything i spose. the dinner for woody...cleaning the bathroom...filling up a friends gas tank when i borrowed the jeep...telling mom im paying for her to fly to hawaii...paying for gas and well...woodys dry cleaning lol. while in the hospital...woody gave me a small yellow bear. sidenote: the other day he had fallen asleep with his head on my chest and well...there is something comforting about a head under my chin. the nearest feeling i can place it with is a maternal feeling. i dont know why...but its like having the baby fall asleep on your chest and knowing theyre safe there. well i was having a hard time getting to sleep once back in my bed in the dorms and some thought came to him....the maternal feeling--stick the bear under my chin on my chest. lo and behold? it worked! my body calmed down...i breathed normally again and was able to sleep. the thoughts in my head as i fell asleep? (yes i was drugged) *k...calm down and breathe. you have to be ok so nothing happens to the baby...* last thoughts through my head as i fell asleep. call me psychotic or whatever but...i slept like a baby and fell asleep just fine. </div><div><br /></div><div>trust.</div><div>after the last boy i told myself it would be almost impossible to trust someone...especially just straight off. that was somewhat truth when i would go on dates or be in public. </div><div><br /></div><div>bam. i start talking to woody and well...none of that. i trusted him from the word go. midnight adventures? no fear. pancakes? his place? 4am? why of course! hawaii had started as a joke...that obviously turned into a serious proposition later on. look into his brown eyes and you know what he says is the truth. nothing is hidden. nothing is dangerous or suppressed for later. its him. all him and i trust him. completely. maybe im a fool for it...but it feels ok to me. </div><div><br /></div><div>love. </div><div>again after the last one i said ill go on dates and have fun but i am <b>not</b> settling for one singular person. i just cant. not for a few years.</div><div>...that worked fine until woody came along. more like i text him...but yall already know that story. having talked to him about it...neither of us figured we could fall for someone so fast. especially after the situations we had been in previously. but fall and fast we did. we have no way to explain it. no rhyme or reason. things he says....well...i cant wait to get back to school to him in the fall. :)</div></div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-20333465351739331512010-04-24T04:46:00.002-06:002010-04-24T07:04:41.776-06:00"and i thought i loved you then...."tuesday my pain was minimal. things were going well and i was on the up and up. since woody had time and wanted to he dropped me off at the hospital for my appointment. i did all the paperwork i had to and was seen shortly afterwards. he wasnt concerned with the apparent genetic defect i could possibly have. he just said that with the size my stones were i should be able to pass them on my own and but if i wanted them out and to be done with it with no more problems then i could come back in thursday as a walk-in since thursday is surgery day and he could get rid of it. i said i should be fine and will try to just flush it out on my own. seemed reasonable to him. appt over so woody picked me up and we headed to his place. ...i know we watched chuck...and well i fell asleep ok? nothing terrible. (blessing in disguise actually). sometime in the night i woke up in pain...he literally force fed me toast and a granola bar along with juice or water...something and then i had my pain pills. after they kicked in i fell asleep again. he had an early meeting and left. (the original plan had been that i would have some food ready when he got back....needless to say that didnt happen). i was still in bed when he got back and he tried to feed me some cereal...to get something in me. i hobbled to the bathroom and after washing my hands basically collapsed on the floor. he tried to hold me up but i just crawled to the toilet and stayed there. by this time, he's called class to let them know he's gonna be late and has talked to mom. phone numbers have been exchanged and taking my to the hospital is discussed. its final. i ask him to take me....im in way too much pain and honestly? there are three comfy beds in town: his, mine and the hospital. his is the closest but doesnt get rid of the crippling pain. mine it the farthest of the three and creates pain to get there (the roads, etc) and doesnt heal my pain once i get there. the hospital is in woody's back yard (literally) and well...they can make me feel better. he drives me over and we walk in. <div><br /></div><div>im a disaster. they admit me and leave woody in the waiting area. they have me put a robe on and take the urine test...the guy had to come in and get me cause i wanted to puke...didnt tho. he then proceeds to <b>try</b> to take a blood sample from my hand. doesnt work so well...so he stans me another...oh 2 times to get blood and then put an iv in. after the iv drip gets going im still in pain since there is nothing to help that pumping through my system. that isnt delivered until woody comes walking through the door...at which point for some unknown reason i just start crying...ugh. he stays by my side the whole time....telling me its gonna be ok.</div><div><br /></div><div>they decide that due to me blood count (white cells that should be at most 13 for me is up to 18) and where the pain is they want to take my appendix out since i have the pain, the nausea, etc to warrant at least a scoping in the stomach to see whats going on. they put me in another room and prep me for surgery. i ask for a blessing and the calls go out to my HTs and bishopric since i had....10 mins until surgery. woody then asks what kind of blessing i want...a comfort or a healing one? ....a comfort one i say. he laughs and says...you only need one person for that and the nurse suggested that there are several in the hospital that are able to give a blessing. ...i turn to woody and ask "well cant you do it?" ...there was a slight pause, a smile and "yes...i can do it." the HTs get there and jesse and woody give me a blessing...the HTs left and woody looked at me and thanked me for asking him to do it. (i didnt say it but...silly thing, of course i wanted him to do it....)</div><div><br /></div><div>so there is this thing that i do to woody and well some people laugh at it when one of us mentions it but...idk its just something that i started doing for him one day. he has hands that dry and crack easily especially here in cedar. so now i carry a lotion in my purse that doesnt smell girly so that if i catch him like that i just massage his hands (lotion included). i know from personal experience in bro wheelers class (us girls had to have something to do i class lol) that it feels amazing. anyways...as we were waiting for me to be taken for surgery we were holding hands and thats when i felt it. dry, cracked hands. i had nothing to do and well...i wanted to take care of him. i asked him to hand me my lotion please and his face.....he just stared at me. a "no" came out. cant say i was too surprised but honestly..ugh. i wanted to. he told me to chill and relax. "here you are laying in a hospital bed and about to go into surgery and youre worried about wanting to take car of me. man did i pick a good one." lol, i guess i just dont see it that way. just second nature. i wanted to make sure he was all set lol and i had nothing else to do...ah well. after the "i love yous" and "ill see you in a little bits" were said, i was wheeled into surgery. </div><div><br /></div><div>i woke up and ...well woody wasnt there. i knew he had things that he wanted to get done while i was in surgery but i cant say it didnt effect me that he wasnt there when i woke up. i couldne see straight and went back to sleep. woke up a little while later to woody next to me and...if i remember right my roomies on the other side of me (i was still out of it). i believe it was the next time that i actually woke up and talked to the nurse and woody. i have 3 holes from the surgery. two from the scopes...(they also filled me with CO2 to have room to see inside) and then another whole in my bellybutton to pull the appendix out. (found out later...my appendix wasnt even bad). </div><div><br /></div><div>laying there in bed...talking to woody...he hangs his head over the bed, kisses my hand and says..."taking care of you...i never thought i would even fall this fast for anyone but i did. i thought i loved you then but caring for you like this...being here by your side...im falling in love even more." ...talk about speechless and humbling. lets just say...it was an effort to not cry. until that moment i had wondered what he thought of me in the hospital like this. to see me as this wreck. to know medically im a mess inside (its ok...i found out the same time he did). i had appreciated everything he had done...everything...from the help and the arm to walk, the hand to hold as i fell asleep, to forcing food down my throat when i was in pain in his arms....lets just say with my past, im not really accustomed to that. ive heard of unconditional love...once upon a time i thought i had that. i was wrong...it was just another conditional love. this? ive been going on dates with woody since valentines day and have been "officially dating" aka...boyfriend/girlfriend since...hawaii. which means we've only been official for a little over a month and a half i guess? (ill finish this tangent in another post...ive been meaning to anyways). all in all? i look at him all the time and ask myself how i got so lucky...how i got someone so great to date...someone that is here for me...it still surprises me sometimes. im a lucky gal. </div><div><br /></div><div>so woody was talking to ian (sigma chi brother) and he and some guys are coming over to see us and asks if theres anything we need. ...lol actually yes. im a girl ok? i ask if they can grab me some underwear for when i finally get to go home. i wish i could have seen their faces when they heard that lol. so woody calls my roommates and they agree. ...they have no clue what kind i want...they agree on comfy ones lol (aw come on...they all are). ...then the dilemma...do they just hand underwear to the guys or do they stick it in something? well a victorias secret bag appears and they make it halfway downstairs when they decide they want to add a note to my present..."dont get your panties all in a bunch! love carlie, jane, and molly" gotta love em lol. in the meantimes the guys are downstairs asking girls walking by if they have any underwear....oh my. so the girls hand them the bag, the guys hand the girls a cup of soup (are you terribly surprised?) and they take off. they show up in the hospital and my nurse tells me just say the word and she can throw the "hooligans" out and winks lol. she was great. well...i hear the guys discuss the trauma of their manliness for carrying a victorias secret bag around...(oh man. you just wait. one day youll be soooo excited but i digress...). </div><div><br /></div><div>a bouquet of flowers from woody was given to me, cards from the guys present and another card from all of sigma chi, toblerones, quite a few jokes and many laughs....oh and apparently quite a few from sigma chi and delta psi wanted to stop by and say hey but woody thought they wouldnt all fit lol. (but thanks for the thought everyone!!) i wondered aloud how so many people knew about me in the hospital and well...think about it. greek system. church. roomies. dorms. hit the rotc grapevine and youre complete lol. according to ian "woody is kind of a big deal on campus" so of course news that his girlfriend is in the hospital will get around. the guys left.</div><div><br /></div><div>madre and woody chatted it up a few times. i think she likes this one ;) thats always nice. seeing how she doesnt like the guys i date....until after i break up with them usually. weird. oh well. in fact i think he mentioned something about beating me...(im sure thatll brighten her up. jk...kinda lol) i think she's mostly surprised that he didnt run off during all this. "why would i leave the woman i love?" ...no he didnt day it to her...but after the fact? he wished he had. ah well. some other time. anyways....night time. i slept off and on and when i was awake would usually just lay there watching him...he would drift off sometimes. poor thing. i was ruining his sleep for the second night in a row and well...lets just say he isnt used to being the person in the chair...he couldnt sleep. he lloks so cute when he drifts off...well and sleeps...and well...in general. he did homework and studies for a final he had the next day. i think he finally got to sleep sometimes around 4ish? im not sure...i sorta woke up when he left to go to his classes. was in and out of sleep...got breakfast which was good and then the doc came in to talk to me. </div><div><br /></div><div>my appendix hadnt been bad but to avoid confusion of pain in the future he had taken it out...it had been swollen. they did nothing about the kidney stones. the thing he was worried about was my guts. oh boy....here it goes. my colon...nowhere near the size and placement within my body it should be. its supposed to be in a nice square around my intestines up near my ribs-ish. mine sit in my pelvis. great. needless to say this causes problems. doc said he was gonna clear me to be discharged whenever woody got back to the hospital. i was keeping food down, my pain was down, i was dizzy or anything. my white blood cell count was up to 20 or 22 which means it had gone <b>up</b> since they had removed my appendix and with no reason for infection, that just isnt normal but since everything else looked good they were gonna release me anyways. </div><div><br /></div><div>woody showed up, took me to dq for some free blizzard and then on to walmart for more pills. lets just say i think i have enough lortabs to last me a lifetime. i lived off 4 after i was hit in the head last summer and well...hm. ok ive used way more than that in the past 48 hours but oh well. after walmart woody and i meet up with ian and some of his buddies at taco bell. i grab a small chicken soft taco and water. after that i crawl into my bed and with pills in the system...pass out. woody stops by later that night to say goodnight...i dont really remember much...i was too drugged honestly. i wake up every 4-8 hrs depends on how many lortabs i had downed the previous pill popping time and take more with some water and a slice of my "favorite! plain, untoasted bread" as said by woody lol. woke up around 7 with was weird cause it was too early for more pills...after waking up a good 2 hours later on the floor against the toilet i took more pills, crawled in bed, and promptly lost everything from the fresh pills to my chicken taco from the day before. tried the pills again and this time tried water and bread again. thankfully the pills stayed in this time even though nothing else did. i crawled in bed on an empty stomach at 10 in the morning. i do nothing but sleep all day. nothing to eat. nothing to drink. </div><div><br /></div><div>woody stops by when he finally wakes up and makes sure im ok. he tries to get me to drink some fluids and well...even he couldnt get me to. he heads to the institute closing social since he's on the council and supposed to be there. mom calls in the afternoon and well....demands i go to the hospital again. im dehydrated. i cant see straight. i can barely walk straight. i had narcotics on an empty stomach. i think im blocked since nothing is passing or getting digested it seems...text him that the roomies are taking me...he shows up with blake (a sig brother-think skinnier, smaller talyor lautner looking kid...the one that plays jake in twilight and thats what he looks like...which speaking of which i need to ask which roomie likes him cause im sure something happened in that waiting room lol). </div><div><br /></div><div>my initial guy was a jokester lol...he said he worked as a stand up comedian sometimes down in vegas. let me just say this guy had me laughing...which hurt of course. </div><div>1"why is an infiniti called that?" </div><div> "why"</div><div> "cause thats how long you make payments on it"</div><div>2"so i was drivin down the road one day and it felt like i hit something...i got out and this guy was yelling at him telling me i had crashed into his car. confused i asked him what he drove"</div><div> "a mirage!" </div><div> "well sir...thats your problem. i couldnt see it. you should have a dodge...at least it would have moved out of the way!"</div><div>after that woody came in and we had a nice greek encounter in the ER...timian was the one that drew blood (alpha phi..i think. dont quote me on that). jantzen volunteers there on the weekend and is chi phi(?). the vlood tech was delta psi i believe. so that was all fun....they had a hard time getting me to even bleed since i was so dehydrated. </div><div><br /></div><div>off for xrays and the guy and i chatted a bit. thing is-the whole i can graduate in 2 years only happens if i pass my classes this semester and with exam this close and such im a bit worried about it. im sure i could do summer classes since a few of them are and not worry...not deal with 19 credits every semester until i graduate but...to grad early? sure would be nice...well anyways he and i were talking about schooling. he asked where i was from and what i was studying. upon hearing me say ag he asked if i was going to be doing like the state ag commerce thing. i told him no. he said he asked because he worked a second job as pest control and you have to go in and take tests to be able to stay up to date and such. he had been jealous of my graduate early deal and had said i hope you fail...jokingly of course...and was now worried that i might someday be his supervisor down in the ag dept. lol</div><div><br /></div><div>all was fairly well. my white blood cell count was back down and nothing other than fluids would do me the most good. they sent me home and home i came. woody forced a cup of juice down me after i took some pills and most of a cup of yogurt. after he left i had a slice of bread and an anti-nausea pill too...laid down to watch csi, house, and miami medical...all in hopes i would fall asleep. nada. here i am...its almost 7 in the morning and im still wide awake. ...i just hope im asleep before he stops by in a little. (he has my id card so he can get in the building since im not exactly going anywhere)<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>...sigh</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-48337325759204187852010-04-24T04:32:00.002-06:002010-04-24T04:46:28.787-06:00my exciting weekend...plus mondayk truth? yes its saturday morning. today is the 24th....and yes its 435 as i start tying this entry. two songs plating over and over and over for the last hour and prolly until i finish writing tonight. ill blame the songs on woody ;) he mentioned em to me today...too bad they had already been on my mind for a while. definitely good songs in general and well...for him and me. he even said so himself. the songs are: <b>gimmie that girl</b>- joe nichols and <b>then</b>- brad paisley. good stuff. anyways...so sunday i make it to my ward!! i know...first time in a while. normally i miss my ward and just go to church with woody...well i get to sacrament with mols and jane...we sit down but not too long after that i just cant make it. i feel sick and head to the bathroom. nothing comes up but i sit there and then go lay on the couch in the hall. mols comes to check on me and brings me my phone and cheerios (the ones id gotten from woody...even tho it made me feel like a lil kid to have cheerios in church). after a bit i felt sick again...while falling asleep over the toilet i text jane to have sis whittaker, my HT, and the bishop to see me after sacrament. sis whittaker helped me out of the bathroom and we got set up for a blessing in the kitchen in a nice cushy chair. i was then presented with a 3 liter jug of apple cider to go home with after the blessing. the girls drove me home and i proceeded to sleep much of the day away. <div><br /></div><div>monday rolls around and i go to my classes and make an appointment with the urologist for tuesday afternoon. pain is bearable and i go through more stuff to throw out and sort...etc. </div><div><br /></div><div>then life gets interesting....</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-57373594536195114592010-04-19T23:46:00.002-06:002010-04-24T04:30:45.771-06:00the great double date (HA!)i had lots of things i wanted to get done saturday. it was my luck that i would get the stupid kidney stones before exams and moving...i literally stayed in bed from the time i got home from the hospital until i went with mols to walmart to fill out the prescription (ibuprofen and lortabs). once i got back, took a dose and hit the bed again. woody called and i hopped in the shower since i knew i was gross. he stopped by once i was ready we headed over to his place so he could take a shower...while he was doing that i made us some sandwiches and we ate an entire jar of peaches (which were delicious by the way). i took another dose of pills so i wouldnt hurt on the ride. <div><br /></div><div>we pulled up to kevins place with the horses and he and i headed out to grab the horses. took a lil while but one they were cornered we caught em and just threw them in the trailer...grabbed blankets and bridles. loaded the dog in the truck bed and the four of us piled in the truck. once getting to three peaks, we unloaded the horses, threw blankets on em and hopped on. woosy was behind me on spider (the old skinny gelding) and kevin and his date (hollie from our horsemanship class) rode rose the young qh. we stayed together for the most part on the ride out. we headed towards the sunset in the hopes of seeing it, but after crossing hill after hill after hill...that didnt happen...especially when climbing up one certain hill both kevin and hollie fell off the horse. woody hopped down to make sure they were ok while i tried to grab rose and make sure she didnt run off. </div><div><br /></div><div>upon failure of seeing a nice sunset from horseback (there was just another hill in the way....) we started heading back. well spider just wanted to get back to the trailer and honestly trotting was not something either woody or i wanted to do even with a blanket on his bony withers. well kev and hollie didnt stick around for us and since they were in front of us and he is native to cedar we figured they would be ok....you can tell from that simple line that was nowhere near how it went huh? good job. </div><div><br /></div><div>it was about an hour after sunset when woody and i made it back to the truck and trailer. (i had been fighting an anxious, spooked, and head tossing horse the entire time back). there was no horse in the trailer and no people in the truck. great. i dont have my phone and woody doesnt have either of their phone numbers. we head back down some of the dirt road a bit...just to see if we can hear them...we cant. we turn around and at this point im worried something couldve happened to em...horse spooked, one of them hurt...anything. its dark and its getting cold fast. woody looked in the truck for a flashlight...nothing. while he was looking around he heard a buzzing sound. hollie had left her phone in the truck and kevin was calling it. after talking for a sec on the phone...everyone was just fine and they should meet us soon back where we were. load up spider in the trailer and he starts freakin out. woody and i sit in the truck just waiting. </div><div><br /></div><div>....k so woody says this just <b>has</b> to be put in here. as we were sitting in the truck waiting..i farted. he heard it. hey it happens ok? its a natural bodily function lol. we all do it, just most of the time we keep it quiet right? well this one slipped under the radar and was heard. he just laughed and said "well i guess we just reached a whole new level in our relationship! (some laughing and then...) this has got to go in the blog!!" i think its kinda funny that he tels me to put things in sometimes.....i prolly would anyways but its just cute....or how he quotes me. yup. he does. i swear lol. </div><div><br /></div><div>back to the story tho...so after many frustrating convos on the phone to figure out where in the world they were to no avail i asked woody if he wanted to talk to kevin since i apparently had <b>no clue</b> about anything. short part to this section that in real life took....an hour and a half to finally get everyone in one place...kevin had no clue where he was. his directions were abominable. his manners to both me and woody, but to me especially were severely lacking and i honestly? i wanted to punch him in the face and leave <b>him</b> on the side of the road by the end of the night. when it was all figured out....he had left hollie with his dog and the horse blanket on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere at 10 at night. he was running with the horse to some main road so that we could be told to drive some road in the hopes that we saw him. </div><div><br /></div><div>left his date. in the dark on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. his dog? a coward. one he hopped in the drivers seat he started driving like a mad man. we actually slid across the road towards the ditch with a horse trailer (that had no lights on it). by this point my pain meds had worn off and well....i wanted to get away from stupid people. the ride back woody said i "disappeared." im sure i did. it took more than just a second to throw a smile on and move on from that while still sitting in that truck. finally threw one on tho and things were just....well much better. </div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-34130190408696585292010-04-17T08:13:00.002-06:002010-04-17T09:43:33.744-06:00my 4am ER adventureok so technically it all began earlier then that, but 4am was when the ER became prominent in this tale.<div><br /></div><div>around lunch time my stomach started hurting and just progressively got worse and worse. it moved from all over abdominal pain to acute, severe pain in my lower right abdominal corner. it hurt to walk, to laugh, to cough...i was not a happy camper. woody picked me up and around then my stomach stopped hurting. dont ask me why, i dont know. sadly his presence didnt stop the coughing...</div><div><br /></div><div>around midnightish when woody was getting ready to leave my stomach started hurting again...after waving to him out the window when he was at his truck i got down off my bed...fell on the floor from pain and couldnt get up. excruciating pain was shooting through me. every cough felt like i would bust something or rip in two. (now i have a high tolerance for pain...it takes a <b>lot</b> to make me even moan in pain). this? i was practically screaming. mols walked into the room and asked if i was ok...if i needed anything. i couldnt even talk. i cccould only hold a finger up to signal "give me a sec." after a few more minutes on the ground i was able to sit up and then to finally stand. molly got me some aspirin and water and then i went and got ready for bed. every cough i had made me freeze in place with a grimace or brought me to my knees...something was seriously wrong and i knew it. i crawl in bed and tried to get to sleep...i was tossing and turning in pain, but the tossing and turning only made it hurt worse. nothing i did could make it feel better..</div><div><br /></div><div>i finally fall asleep around 1:30-2ish and wake up at 3:30 from the pain. clenching my stomach i silently screamed in pain with tears in my eyes. i knew what i should do but was i gonna do it? i wanted to call mom. i was afraid it was my appendix and that it was gonna burst. mi madre had hers out about 10 years ago and so i called her up at 4 in the morning (so 5am for her)...i told her where i hurt, how i hurt, and the fact that when i walked i was nauseous...she told me to go the hospital...i said ok and hung up. i crawl back in bed and try to see if itll go away. needless to say it doesnt...i sit up and try to blow my nose and when i couldnt even do that from the pain...i woke mols up and asked if we could go to the ER...now. she said yes and so we (more like mols stand next to me and i just try to not fall or get sick). there was a group chillin in the 1st floor lounge...apparently they hadnt gone to sleep yet...and upon mols' announcement that we were going to the ER were...silent. </div><div><br /></div><div>it was painful to ride in the car...i didnt car about cold or warm air...i just wanted to not hurt. we get in, i check in and they take us inside the ER section. did the usual urine analysis (yes this <b>is </b>relevant to the story). after sitting in the room for a minute, the nurse comes in telling me to put a robe on and that once im done he'll be back for a blood test and an IV. once the blood is drawn and an IV done he tells me im getting narcotics for the pain and that ill feel funny once it hits my whole system. <b>wow...he wasnt kidding</b>. i can always tell where the stuff is cause i can feel it run through the veins but this stuff? once it hit my chest and lungs i was done. it felt like a horse was sitting on my chest and that someone had just swirled the room and mixed my brain in with it. i swear my first thought was angie (amy poehler) from baby mama in the hospital when she says "this is good, whats the street name for this stuff?" i felt like that. sadly it only lasted a few minutes in my system. around this time is when i call woody...no answer. so i leave a voicemail and a text. of course he calls back while im getting an ultrasound...</div><div><br /></div><div>but before the ultrasound...i got a lovely story from mols. sadly i didnt record it on my phone but i do remember some of it. ill share the highlights. </div><div>"once upon a time there was this girl...named rachel. this girl loved going to the hospital for the lovely IV drugs. she knew this guy named grant that loved to walk in on naked people...nothing pornish just...he was just weird like that. well one day they both tried walking into a room that had what they liked and wham! they were transported into an alternate universe!! there was the chuck-e-cheeses but you could actually see all the gross germs on the toys, the workers, and the pizza. rachel was on one side of the alternate universe and grant was on the other side. grant met some people and asked how come they always have clothes on. "because if we take our clothes off we turn into donkeys! ...and sometimes you even see little donkey babies running around" grant asked how they have kids.. "you dont want to know." (have i told you mols makes some funny/crazy stories? lol). so anyways the people in this universe dont get hungry...ever. rachel was looking for a hospital and the people said they dont need one in this universe because when they get sick they just eat the gross chuck-e-cheese pizza and get more sick..well rachel finds a hospital and says she is sick and that she needs some drugs. well the doctor agrees and comes back with a huge cottonball and tries shoving it down her mouth! she runs out of the building and telepathically connected to grant so that they could find each other. she tells him to not move and she will be there soon. well while grant was waiting all this food was right in front of him but everytime he reached for it...it disappeared!! then this huge delicious looking burger got close but grant acted like he didnt want it. so the burger got closer and closer and started talking! it was taunting grant and finally grant took a huge bite out it and all of a sudden these huge rock cops came out of the ground and dragged grant away. when rachel gets to where he was, she couldnt find him. she asks her unicorn friends to help her and they find grant. thing is tho, they dont want to go back to their universe. they want to rule over this one! so rachel becomes the queen and names the place grantsville, utah where grant is a lord over it all. the end. </div><div>(yes, she really told this to me...with more detail of course...)</div><div><br /></div><div>(yes you will be getting the whole story...you have been warned). apparently one of the doctors was worried it might be a cyst on my ovaries. at this point i was praying "please no, please not this..." well the lady had a really hard time finding my uterus in the first place...much less find a good angle to see it from. so when that technique failed we had to go to another way. i got probed. this way worked apparently. apparently i hide my uterus behind my bladder towards my back...nothing wrong with that. it just makes it difficult for doctors a lot of times supposedly. head back to the room. chill there for a little bit. </div><div><br /></div><div>apparently the ultrasound didnt give them any answers as to why i was in pain. the next test to steal me away from mols and the warm comfy bed was a CT scan of my abdomen. i about feel asleep is was so nice and peaceful. anyways...apparently they could see my undigested pills in my stomach...had to explain all <b>that</b> stuff. so thankfully this one gave them an answer that works for them...hopefully its the full and correct answer. i have a kidney stone. i know. so exciting. painful? most definitely. anothe doc walks in and tells me all this and then asks if there is anyway i could be pregnant. uhmmm..no. "are you sure?" yes. besides the fact that you just had two different ultrasounds, a CT scan, a blood test, and that im on my period right now doesnt scream not pregnant? well anyways he wants me to take a test anyways just so he could "get to sleep better tonight"...he walks back in and says they had already taken one from that urine analysis from earlier. he smiled and said, "Congratulations!! you are <b>not</b> pregnant!" gee thanks doc...i was sooo worried. anyways they did give me more drugs that actually seem to be working so far thank goodness. im pretty sure the kidney stone thing is something i inherited though be sure that i will do what i can to not get anymore so long as i can help it. i walk out of the hospital with papers, two prescriptions to fill (yay more drugs ill never finish off), filters, and a cup. oh goody. </div><div><br /></div><div>mols and i get outside and wait for woody to show up before he heads out to work at the ranch in parawon. so long as im not in pain and i feel up to it, that double date should still be on for tonight. needless to say i had scared woody that i was in the hospital (he had been worried about me yesterday and i just kept saying ill be fine...ill be fine. guess he had a right to be worried huh?) so after he leaves, mols and i head to mcdonalds. while in the hospital bed i craved a mcgriddle (i like em ok?) so we stopped there and i grabbed one. told madre about my adventure i had gone through after calling her...and here i sit typing this and downing water like crazy...its nap time. im tired. </div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-79896945079722362712010-04-16T14:05:00.002-06:002010-04-16T14:26:02.062-06:00blah. blah.oh to believe liars. i dont. here is the situation. first off--i feel like crap today. honest to goodness. people wont think im sick tho cause i kinda dressed up today...just a skirt and such but still it isnt usual for me to do this. anyways...i feel horrible and nothing is making my poor stomach feel better. its an overcast day today. now to top it off? i have to text my ex. yes sadly the word "have" is the truth. after we broke up i mailed him his stuff shortly afterwards. i have since asked multiple times nicely for him to mail me my stuff. i even said send it to me care of and ill pay for it. at that point he had said he had already mailed it off. that was the beginning of last week. still nothing. trust me, ive checked. once again, i text him today asking him to get me my stuff in the mail asap or when i came home next week ill stop by and take everything that is mine. that is definitely not something i want to do. id rather avoid him and such but im really just sick and tired of asking for it back. there is no point in him having it all...the things im asking for are things like half a bathing suit, shorts, a dress, and last but certainly not least my senior yearbook. i just want it back. <div><br /></div><div>another dilemma? with the money ill earn this summer ive already promised mom i would give her a vacation since she certainly needs one and deserves one. here comes the next thing regarding what i make. i mean obviously ill pay tithing and savings but then...buy a vacation for spring break or buy a cheap jeep or truck...i cant do both. my major requires that im at the suu farm a lot and thats 5 miles away...doesnt sound far but to walk or bike still takes a fair amount of time. add in the weather here in cedar and a vehicle becomes almost mandatory to go that far for a class. decisions decisions...i guess ill just have to figure that out when i figure out how much ill even make..</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-13597083645928369612010-04-15T21:06:00.002-06:002010-04-15T21:29:13.819-06:00mucinex-D is a miracle drugthank goodness im in the "18 or over" category. seriously. life is so much better being "legal." (yes of course that poses the question legal for what...but who cares right?) anyways, ive had this head cold/allergy combo that has been kicking my butt for the last two weeks or so. at first it was a sore throat, probably from post nasal drip (yum). anyways...the throat got to feeling better after a short while thankfully but then it moved into my ears and nose. sinus cold. perfect. i had sworn id bought sudafed last semester and couldnt have used it all already but i couldnt find it. so today upon asking a friend if i could borrow his car and putting gas in it i went to walmart....and i got a box of mucinex-D. i had been trying to decide if i wanted mucinex or sudafed more and then to find out i can get a combo? perfecto!!! (speaking of which.....i need some more...)<div><br /></div><div>i have begun the process of throwing out <b>junk</b> i have here in cedar (youd be so proud mom). i seriously just have stuff here that i look at and think...what was i thinking?! anyways im throwing things out. everything from papers and such to possibly some clothes. i think about this as i look at the mess of a room i sit in right now...but honestly? when i go through stuff its definitely not neat and orderly. i try to go through one section at a time but alas...it never quite works that way. ah well. </div><div><br /></div><div>so apparently the whole finishing school in school years? well...lol its still gonna happen. i was talking to lee, my horsemanship prof, and asked about the practicum on the requirements to get the equine studies associates...the practicum? what is that you ask? well pretty much i can get college credit for working on the ranch this summer. ya....that awesome...ill go and start the paperwork for that tomorrow morning but i just have to keep a journal over the summer and have the bosses confirm stuff at the end of the summer so this is seriously the best major ever! </div><div><br /></div><div>sidenote: can i just say that im gonna sit here for a sec and applaud myself. washed the hair, put product in it and but it in two side braids...(i look like such a little kid like this). went to class like this and of course this is the day lee takes pics of us out on the trail. as soon as class is out, i take the hair down to get a "wind-blown" look. get back and seriously have to not smell like horse, change, and put some form of make-up on and run across campus to get to a dinner all in a matter of 15 mins. i made it. with a few minutes to spare. <b>BAM!!</b> </div><div><br /></div><div>anyways...i need to clean up some before woody stops by for another surprise adventure (he never tells me what we are going to do until we do it...which honestly? i like. i like the little things. the little surprises. so who knows whatll happen, but its guaranteed to be fun and lovely as per the norm). so later...ive got someone to attend to ;)</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-90874684325139236652010-04-15T11:14:00.002-06:002010-04-15T13:15:52.147-06:00a headlight, dinner, and stolen yogurtyesterday was a non-stop action packed day until we got to st george...thankfully my psych class was cancelled today so class? psh. nothing until 4 and then im go go go again cause as soon as im outa horsemanship i have to rush back here and then change for the rotc dinner tonight and then get there....<div><br /></div><div>so anyways...yesterday. woke up and my suspicions were confirmed...mother nature stopped by in the middle of the night. she's such a dear isnt she? take care of that and then cramps hit me. perfect. i hadnt had any in a while so it was definitely painful. threw on a hoodie and warmed a hot pack and wrapped it around my belly since i had a meeting with my college advisor. got my classes sorted out and registered for next semester. i grabbed some breakfast and headed to the health clinic. my prescription is almost out and so i wanted to take care of that before summer time. i was just gonna make an appt but they had time and took care of me on the spot. once that was done headed to rotc to make sure of the attire for the evening from judy. yes its church attire aka semi-formal. i stayed and chatted about the usual...(horsemanship). she's in the same class only on an earlier day so i can kind of know what to expect on the quizzes. head back to the dorms to change items and cool off (i was burning up) and grab my stuff for history class. </div><div><br /></div><div>once class was over, copied the notes and headed to lunch. only had a bowl of sticky rice with salt and a cup of water. called mom on the way back to the dorms and well...i kinda snapped at her a few times. i was trying to ask of there were other foods that had potassium in them besides foods i cant eat and foods they dont serve in the dining hall. sadly they dont have potassium in the vitamins i take as it is like i thought they did. i miss my greens aka collard greens, turnip greens, spinach...in the entire year of foods at the dining hall i could count on one hand how many times they have served those types of greens. anywats...a body knows what it needs...i could tell i needed aspirin, potassium, and water. i wont get into me snapping. it felt weird tho....im gonna blame that on the period and stupid hormones. i needed laundry done so i sorted super fast and just did two big loads and headed straight to biology with jane and carlie showed up soon after that. great class as usual but i booked it back to the dorms to move laundry from washer to the dryer and after that sat and planned out the next two of school on paper...if all goes well i can graduate in two years...which means i can be done with all of college and graduate with a bachelors within 3 years of starting college. super excited about that!! called madre up and apologized and told her my news...and she wants me to double major or pick up a minor right since i cut a whole year out of my schooling.....what?! sounds good BUT i was getting out of school early...sorry. i would rather not extend it longer then i want to. </div><div><br /></div><div>ran and checked the dryers....colors and whites werent dry yet but i pulled the towels and jeans out and jumped in the shower. got out, threw some clothes on and got the clothes out of the dryer, brought em to my room, grabbed what i wanted from the bag, got dressed and at this point have about 10 mins until woody picks me up...crap. blow dry the hair, lotion, shoes, threw on a little bit of makeup and ran out to woody and his truck after yes, leaving my room a disaster area. we put some air in the tires, got some gas and hit the road towards st george...now he and i had talked about me getting a skirt...more than likely a white pencil skirt. i have a black one that...well...my hips are just not built for the skirt anymore. we stopped at kohls to have a look at clothes. nothing there. we went to target...looked, saw a dress and a white pencil skirt...sadly the skirt didnt fit right but the dress? perfect! then decision time comes...buy the dress or head somewhere else and if we dont find what we're looking for then come back to target and hope the dress was still there (it was the only one of its size left). well woody said we could get it, and if we find something better we could bring it back...sounded good to me so thats what we did. we get to the register and before i could even open my wallet, he paid for it...apparently this was my very late birthday present. "im not missing you birthday again. not next year, or the year after, or the next, or the next...." hm... well we headed to ross to see if we could find something else....found a nice black and white skirt there and we get to the checkout. its rung up and well...since he got distracted by a nickel on the floor i beat him to the punch and paid for this one. apparently he was supposed to buy that one cause he says he owes my now...(silly boy no you dont. you dont owe me a thing. i promise.) oh drats..that reminds me i was supposed to leave the lotion in his truck. call him spoiled or me the spoiler but his hands crack and well i have a tendency to just do things...like pack lotion that isnt girly smelling and massage his hands (ya ya i know...oh well)</div><div><br /></div><div>we get to house, greeted by the dogs and sit down to a delicious dinner. seriously...its rather refreshing to sit down to a family dinner. the dining hall is nice and usually serves good stuff but i miss sitting around the table with a family. it was nice. the food was yummy and the company? sincere and inclusive. after dinner, cleaned up a bit and headed to the grandparents house down the street...oddly enough? grandpa reminded me of mine in illinois...even said the exact line grampa says "oh im easy to get along with." apparently i didnt blush? it was cute ok. im used to "old" people. ive got a story or two that would curl your hair tho *shudder.* thats probably why it was difficult to make me blush. its odd to think that i didnt even think of my paternal grandparents...guess it kinda makes since tho...theyve been gone for several years at the latest. </div><div><br /></div><div>so anyways, we get back...chit chat, talk rifles..etc. you know the norm. lol. so we head back to cedar and we hadnt even made it out of st george and two cop cars hit their lights to pull us over. we just laugh cause we know what its about...the left front light has a short in it and usually is out unless you hit the cover. so anyways...the usual registration and id deal...came back super fast and this time with his buddy up by my window and asked if there were any weapons in the car...uh ya. there was a 12 gauge in the back seat with no ammo present...he asks again..."no handguns?" cause i see you dont have a concealed carry permit and looks like you have a handgun case in the back seat too....</div><div>w: "oh, no thats the cleaning kit for the shotgun." </div><div>cop: "ok, well have a nice night"</div><div><br /></div><div>we continue on our way. we hit the freeway and after a little ways a highway patrolman sitting in the middle lane pulls out after we pass by. (you know where this is going dont ya). so he takes a while deciding if its worth it and then finally catches up to us...we pull into the right lane. he's right on our butt. he hits the lights. we laugh and groan at the same time. its already midnight and at this point just want to make it home before 1 in the morning. . we pull over and he comes up to my window...same spiel over again...we told him we had <b>just</b> been pulled over in st george and were just on our way home from his brothers birthday. </div><div>cop: "did he give you a ticket?"</div><div>w: "no.."</div><div>cop: "k. dont go anywhere. ill be right back with your stuff after i check it all out" </div><div>w: (after the cop walks away) "at this rate if we get pulled over every 10 mins, we'll be lucky to be home before 2.....this <b>has </b>to go in the blog!!"</div><div>i just laugh at him...cop comes back. woody got a warning out of it and we went on our merry way. finally got back. he walks me up to my door and "those magnets" (he quotes me now...great lol. i dont mind...its funny) made it hard for him to leave. i swear i tried kicking him out (sorta). i like him being here but i know he needs the sleep...he finally leaves and i crawl in bed. </div><div><br /></div><div>wake up? room is a disaster...ok so its still a disaster but as soon as i woke up i went to grab one of my yogurts in the fridge from down the hall....i had put my name on each one and such...but where two were supposed to be, there was only one. i had bought 3-vanilla, banana cream pie, and key lime pie. i had already eaten the banana one...wanna guess which one was stolen? my key lime pie. of course. ugh. i eat my yogurt and have simply only sat here and written this ridiculously long post. great. im gonna grab some lunch and then get ready for the dinner tonight even though i have horsemanship first...i got this. </div><div><br /></div><div>hm...maybe ill clean my room up. now<b> theres</b> an idea....anywats...</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-77380488743314754552010-04-13T00:03:00.003-06:002010-04-13T02:18:13.058-06:00a new type of adventure**i now <b>know</b> that people do in fact read this blog. its nice but at the same time? can be intimidating. but? well im just gonna keep writing like i have been. maybe a few less punctuation and spelling mistakes (no guarantees), but how this blog is gonna go, should be the same**<div><br /></div><div>woke up to my usual morning text before 8 today and...promptly fell back asleep. woke up, got ready for the day...thought about wearing shorts...didnt. time frame? 12. i went to class. (it was warm and sunny outside). 1250. copied my notes in the student services center. 1255. grabbed some lunch. 115. walked outside. (it was cloudy, windy, and freezing). 130. raindrops are felt. 145. it started raining lightly. 150. it started raining harder. 153. it was sleeting. and by 155...it was snowing. gotta love cedar city...ugh. <div><br /></div><div>my surprise in the day started when woody and two of his brothers came and ate dinner with me tonight. as we're grabbing some salad, woody says that he had talked to his dad and that he had mentioned something about a blog and his mom crying when she read a certain entry. i froze. i didnt want to hear anymore. my first thoughts were that they had said something about what i had written and ruining...well something. throughout dinner i sat and thought about what he had said...what kind of cry was it? is it the post i think it is? what do they think of it? whats woody gonna say when he finds out? </div><div><br /></div><div>when i head to the library to work on some psych notes i stop at the computer to check my blog out real fast...sure enough it was the post i thought it was...i reread it prolly two or three times and ya know what? i cried when i read it...every single time. i see woody when he gets out of the chapter meeting and after he left i text him telling him that i had reread it and that i too had cried. </div><div><br /></div><div>the roomies and i go to walmart...we all needed stuff. laughs and such were numerous...talked to madre. oh! speaking of madre i talked to my boss this morning...she was asking when i would be getting to the ranch, how i was getting there etc. told her all of that and asked if it was alright that woody stay the night since we would get to the ranch in the evening...and im not gonna kick him out the next day. we'll explore the ranch...he wants to go riding if possible...and he can leave the friday that i start working. i hadnt been back long from walmart when woody called saying he would be over in a few minutes...</div><div><br /></div><div>as soon as he walks in the door he tells me that he wants to read the post. he told me that he had talked to his mom and she had told him that he should read it...plus combined with me telling him i had cried when i had read my own post...he really wanted to read it. the look of horror on my face did nothing to stop him. i tried going.."no, you dont wanna read it...really. its ok. you dont need to. no honestly its nothing...no...dont do it. no..you..no..really. its stupid...you dont wanna..." needless to say that didnt work. him: "i could always get the link from my parents...how did they find out you had a blog before i even did?" ;) so i scroll to the post and try walking out of the room...that didnt happen. he grabbed me and sat me down on his lap while he began to read...</div><div><br /></div><div>he pauses half-way through the second paragraph. he look at me and asks if i have something to say before he reads anymore. if not, then he will wait to read it later when i want him to read it. i literally sat there forever after he said that. i didnt look at him, i didnt say anything. i sat and asked myself if it was the right time...thats when i realized ever since he had mentioned my blog that i hadnt been scared of saying anything...i was ready. i felt calm...assured...at peace...and ready. granted it took a few times to start up to say what was coming but once i <b>knew</b> it was alright to say it...i said it. "ive been falling in love with you." looking back i wanna say i was scared for his response but honestly? i wasnt scared. not at all. i just sat there. a slight pause between the two of us and his response came...quiet, but self-assured. "good because ive been falling for you for a long time. ... you know? its kinda weird to say it, but...it feels so right" (didnt say anything but man...that was so true. it does feel right). pause here to say that when i write things in a churchy way that i dont want to come off as "oh, its meant to be." do i believe in that policy? eh...im not sure. its just interesting to lay out everything and then to backtrack and see all the connections...example. i got woodys number because last minute, kayla was leaving town early and couldnt take me to the airport the next day for me to get home on christmas break. (he took me to the airport the next day. she brought it up today...and she was right. i wouldnt have even had his number if it wasnt for that). </div><div><br /></div><div>the colorado trip was talked about...found out his mom is offering to let us use her car instead of his truck...(since i was the one paying for gas? thank you. seriously). we'll leave earrrly wednesday morning, hit moab on the way up, grand junction, and be in parshall by dinner time. it will be <b>perfect</b>. a great trip with a great guy. i cant wait for the trip, but it sucks even more now to have to leave woody behind in cedar this summer. he told me though that we will still be dating in the fall when i get back...that we'll see how this all works out. </div><div><br /></div><div>now that he's been in my head by way of reading my blog, he says "now i see from what way youre coming from." in fact one question he had for me was "so if i gained 60 lbs of belly and such, you would still love me?" "<b>yes" </b>i said. "ill always love you." a few minutes later i bust out laughing...he asks what was so funny and i said well i was just picturing you as the fat old man with the gut and... well thats a healthy boy! ...laughter exploded from both of us and well...it was priceless. </div><div><br /></div><div>he doesnt believe ive ever been a bad cook...just ask my mom. im baaaaddd. unless im cooking for him..its weird. speaking of madre again...got my flight itinerary for heading home and flying back after exams are done...itll be weird to be home. and storage. drats. i need to find a place to store my bike for the summer along with some things that im not taking to colorado but want for next school year...any ideas? cheap climate controlled storage units anyone? help or suggestions greatly wanted. also i signed the contract and paid the deposit on the apartments i will be living in next semester...not too shabby for all the amenitites plus in walking distance? works just fine for me. anyways its waaayyy past my bed time so off to bed. </div><div><br /></div><div>short story to my long post? it has now been said face to face...i love him. and he loves me. :) we got this. </div></div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-42041839926582192702010-04-11T23:43:00.007-06:002010-04-12T21:39:42.220-06:00im a hick because....so its official. im classified as a hick. <div><br /></div><div>~i grew up in tennessee</div><div>~i grew up no more than 17 miles from the kentucky border</div><div>~directions to my house consisted of "pass the beer box, then the dump and pappy's beer place...go down the hill and when you see the school bus sign, start slowing down...watch out for stray dogs and random kids in the street</div><div>~when a dog down the street is named after a tractor (kubota and kb...short for kubota's brother)</div><div>~when the neighbors duck thinks its a dog</div><div>~i wear boots more than shoes or flip-flops...and by boots i mean all 4 different pairs and in all weather</div><div>~my nicknames include- "tennessee" or "boots"</div><div>~i say and write the word "yall"</div><div>~i have an accent</div><div>~i supposedly got the burn on my arm from touching the copper pipes on my moonshine still</div><div>~ive eaten squirrel, deer, and snapping turtle</div><div>~i enjoy eating squirrel, deer, and snapping turtle</div><div>~for my eighth birthday i got a bow and arrows</div><div>~i own many firearms and have the phone number of the firing range in my phone</div><div>~ i have a john deere blanket</div><div>~i wear a chevy truck hat and a fox racing shirt at the same time</div><div>~i asked for a toolbox for my truck bed for christmas</div><div>~i have a horseshoe hanging on my wall along with a horse calendar and posters</div><div>~i have a map of local BLM land with mustang herds on it on my wall</div><div>~i get excited when i hear the budweiser clydesdales are coming to town</div><div>~i get excited when i think about going to cal ranch to look for wrangler jeans</div><div>~i own little boy flannel button up shirts</div><div>~i wanted to go the monster truck show in provo on valentines day</div><div>~my dream was to work on a ranch</div><div>~my favorite class involves dirt, horse hair, and pain</div><div>~ive changed my major to agriculture</div><div>~i hate it when my work boots get cleaned</div><div>~i go to dinner in muck and mud, covered in horse hair, and smelling horrible and afterwards? my boyfriend will still kiss me and hold my hand</div><div>~my first car was actually a truck</div><div>~i use the word trompin' (which means explorin' and walkin' through the woods)</div><div>~i cut off the "g" in words</div><div>~my grandparents live in " polecat holla"</div><div>~its a big deal to get gussied up</div><div>~ive been to dollywood (and didnt feel outa place)</div><div>~i love wings, pork rinds, mashed 'taters and gravy, fried foods, and fresh fish from the pond</div><div>~lock b is the place to go...shooting AND muddin'</div><div>~ive worn confederate flags to school</div><div>~i had a cb radio in my truck...and have had a trucker nickname for the road</div><div>~ive actually been boot scootin boogie-ing</div><div>~i can sing along to hank williams jr, johnny cash, cw mccall, and johnny horton</div><div>~i got excited when in history class, TVA popped up on the screen</div><div>~ive changed my oil and filter in my truck</div><div>~ive done the dukes of hazzard slide across the hood move</div><div>~hey yall watch this heralded free entertainment</div><div>~i own several belt buckles</div><div>~i know what chiggers are</div><div>~ive sat on a back porch and shot targets from the chair</div><div>~mom and i discuss guns and ammo over the phone at dinner time</div><div>~i had "custom" pedal extenders on my truck, knives hidden in the cab, and parachute cord hanging from the rearview mirror</div><div>~bbq/pulled pork is a great meal</div><div>~smokin barns are a common sight in the fall</div><div>~i own camo</div><div>~i love going barefoot</div><div>~i cried for my truck when i totaled it</div><div>~i know how nascar got started</div><div>~ive whittled a wooden spoon</div><div>**im bummed that i didnt make it to the mule day festival back home</div><div>**ive had a knife strapped to my thigh before</div><div>**ive participated in hatchet throws and have earned the title of "hatchet queen"</div><div>**shotguns are typical christmas presents</div><div>**ive gone outside to grab things for dinner</div><div>**i almost brought mom a live copperhead to her for mothers day</div><div>**i know the woods like the back of my hand</div><div>**ive owned a duct tape wallet</div><div>**ive carried duct tape in my purse (i carry every day..in the purse)</div><div>**duct tape is a staple for travel (...for life actually)</div><div>**sweet tea. 'nuff said</div><div><br /></div><div>...and im sure i could think of more...or people could think of more for me but i think this is long enough. as i hear more i may add them in. </div><div><br /></div><div>**are additions</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-25252060330580474062010-04-09T23:56:00.002-06:002010-04-10T00:17:44.545-06:00an everything post...so yesterday in horsemanship? i was literally rubbed raw in the saddle...so much sitting trotting and then loping? ouch. so i tell woody that i was on a palomino in class...upon asking what that was i simplified it by saying a blonde horse. ...there was a pause, a look, and then laughing ensued. he said "was that a good idea? a blonde horse and a blonde girl?" ...ya ya ya laugh it up chuckles... later that night he came over and we were all chilling in jane and carlies' room just talking and laughing. well woody's text alert goes off (its a wolf whistle) and carlies yells out the window "thank you!!" while jane hops on her bed and looks out the window with mols to see who had whistled at them...meanwhile woody and i are on the ground rolling. he had told me people look out the window when they hear his alert tone, but i had never witnessed it, nor had ever done it. it was priceless. <div><br /></div><div>today was also a great day for laughs...im sitting in the dining hall and mols walks up behind me and whispers in my ear that "dont look now, but you forgot to put some pants on today" ... later on she shows me a flyer she found on the floor...mols: "theyre looking for you 'rental girls wanted'" ...heck yes. i also attended the king 'tute pageant...it was a hoot! ill have to get some pics and vids from kenz but they will make you chuckle for sure ;) </div><div><br /></div><div>so anyways, woody and i finally went out to eat lol...ok not finally per say but tonight was the first time ever...(thanks mom)...i uh came up with a brilliant idea if i do say so myself...i suggested i fly to vegas, hitch a shuttle to st george and maybe cedar and he drive me up to the ranch...he'll get to visit it and ill get some more time with him..win win situation if i do say so myself since he wants to visit the ranch but wont be able to later on since he isnt family...hope that works out lol...</div><div><br /></div><div>oh! got my major switched today...im gonna digress for a sec but...seriously why cant we just take courses we need instead of having to take non-related courses that waste my time and money? i want to own ranch...not be a soil and plant expert. part of the requirements for my ag degree is taking plant productions and soil anaylsis courses...ugh. i just wanna spend my time at the suu farm...can i not just do that? k-back on topic. i changed from a bio major to agriculture science...i wanna take some business and special education courses because when i have the ranch and money, i want to have an equine therapy camp or program for mentally and physically handicapped children. (ill also have to be certified for NARHA [north american riding for the handicapped association] to have the program at my place....</div><div><br /></div><div>tomorrow im off to hit DI and cal ranch to find some cheap boots, jeans, shirts, and maybe a hat for the ranch...gotta start prepping for the move out...wish me luck...ill need it. g*night</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-60074851663456659762010-04-07T23:31:00.002-06:002010-04-08T00:15:20.227-06:00just feel like...cryingalright. i know i havent caught everyone up to date on spring break, the sigma chi formal or general conference. ill just do it all in pictures and have captions for it when i feel like doing it and have time and patience. <div><br /></div><div>honestly its bed time and i just wanna curl up in a ball and fall asleep. thing is tho...yesterday an emotion hit me that i havent felt in quite some time. i felt sadness and anxiety. back in the day when i dated in high school...most guys didnt last past 2 weeks cause i just...got cold feet i guess. i played it off as it wouldnt work and i dont see this goind anywhere so why waste time...right? well i never had that with woody ok? weird...but i didnt. here it is almost two months of hanging out. getting to know each other and dating and now something with a twist is hitting me. here;s how its been going through my head..</div><div><br /></div><div>the way we got hooked up...holy ghost. way we started talking once i was single...holy ghost. way i made decisions around him and regarding things (including hawaii)...holy ghost. my post traumatic stress disorder fixed through woody...still a work in progress around other people (but when im with him its perfectly fine). if you look at what we want from life, plans, goals, desires...they take us the same place and the differences in career paths would not be a problem as far as i can see. one day i want a ranch...originally i thought i would just bred, train, show, compete, etc with them...and then again the holy ghost jumped in forcefully this past weekend (because i brush this thought off) until this weekend....i want to add in a course or camp or something for the mentally and physically disabled for equine therapy. ...sitting on the beach with woody? out of the blue he says that he's always wanted a bunch of horses, that he doesnt know much about them, but that he loves them and always has wanted some....</div><div><br /></div><div>regarding spirituality...he has a handsome spirit. one that moves me. one that im drawn to. he could look different and whatever is inside is what i love...what im falling for. of course a handsome face and physique is lovely but its what is inside for me regarding him. granted it was looks that i noticed at first...actually thats a lie. i felt him walk towards me rather than see him the first night i met him. i liked him on the spot. i wanted to be close to him...to get to know him but since i was dating someone i had to leave it be. we hit it off that first night and even told him to his face that "well ill prolly never see ya again...so bye." (he makes fun of me for that now lol). hugging him its like a magnet in him and a magnet in me...neither of us wants to let go...its a physical effort to move apart. </div><div><br /></div><div>bro paul asked me last night...are you in love with him? i paused and said...im falling...im falling. i suppose you could say ive fallen but im holding back. im scared. honest to goodness. he's the best thing i know and treats me better then i ever thought i would get. if i could tell you the compliments...the everything he says to me on a daily basis...how he'll look at me and when i ask what he's thinking he'll respond "how did i get so lucky?" ...its all about the little things...the night he took me out to an empty park parking lot at night just to turn some music on, pull me out of the truck, and dance...the way he looks at me. ok so maybe ive fallen for him....i just hide it. im scared. im scared of being hurt. im scared of losing him. im scared that in a matter of weeks i wont see him for months and who knows whatll happen. will we both live through the summer? each day is precious and life is short. life is so touchy and easy to snuff out. will we have feelings for each other in the fall when we see each other again? will we date in the fall?... ive told myself not to think about it cause im just living for the day but...im sorry. i live for certain things in the future and well...anyways. </div><div><br /></div><div>i can sit and say i could see us 100 years old acting the way we do now. there has never been a moment we've argued. (i know that arguing happens and sometimes even necessary but we honestly are just so on the same page...there is none of that). never a moment he had made me sad or angry. ive been on a constant high (for a lack of a better term) since that valentines day that we first hung out. (which speaking of which i totally made pancakes at his place the other day and thats the first time ive never burned pancakes...) he makes me a better me in so many ways...including a better cook. </div><div><br /></div><div>i guess that yesterday it just kind of hit me that im falling in love and i dont know how to show it. im scared to even show it. im scared to say it to him. im afraid...afraid of how itll change the dynamic of what we have now. im afraid for his reaction. i afraid that i dont know how he really feels...all i know is that he "really really likes me a lot" and has mentioned plans and expeditions in the future (like the one that we're supposed to do in 30 years...or next spring break we'll go off to australia). i dont know what to think...what to do...</div><div><br /></div><div>im me around him and he seems to be him around me. ive done stupid things, crazy things, blonde things, gross things...and he's been right there...or i tell him about it and he's still there the next day. he knows ive made mistakes in life and "nothing in your past can push me away"...there are things he just says that make me want to cry right there on the spot because he has no idea how much they mean to me...how much they touch me and feel even more at ease. i really just..i dont know. we have 2 weeks plus finals left in school and i dont know what to do. </div><div><br /></div><div>i dont know what to do. every day i fall more for him. we fall more into place and find happiness in every moment we spend together and even apart i feel. im falling for him and i dont know what to do. </div><div><br /></div><div>i dont know what to do.</div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1353490630427092702.post-47721103625611774492010-03-23T18:40:00.005-06:002010-03-29T00:07:39.185-06:00spring break 2010 --PART 1let me just say that this was the absolute best spring break i have ever had!<div><br /></div><div>saturday..hung out with anthony (twon) and ..drats i forgot her name. sunday spent a little while with nick...he showed me a music site online i can find music and can get it for free...and then learned that yes frostwire is free...so i downloaded that too so now i can actually have new music on my mp3...what a novel idea! ...and from here the adventures begin!!</div><div><br /></div><div>monday...</div><div>well i get to bed after experiencing the power go out in the dorm building...0730. i crawl in bed and fall asleep. wake up to pounding on my door...its maintenance to work on the shower. i let em in and shut my door, crawl back in bed, fall asleep. i woke up after two missed calls from michael (a friend from rotc)...so i call him back and he said he'd be by soon to pick me up. after he picks me up we head to brian head for me to finally experience snowboarding! it was 50 degrees outside..beautiful day. so i wear a short sleeve short, snow gloves, beanie, goggles, show pants, and of course the board boots. let me just say that after being a fast learner and hitting the slopes real fast...i got the hang of it. after getting the hang of it...i fell in love with the sport! learned as much as i could about it...had a complete blast! we even hot the bigger slopes...i did some jumps, crash landed many times of course but laughed and enjoyed the entire thing. i had a sun burn mixed with snow burn from about two inches abouve my wrist to about an inch above my elbow...plus the great goggle tan lines. priceless. after getting back to the dorms i looked up equipment and am really eyeing certain things to buy up later. well im trying to make sure i have a ride to vegas for tuesday and call up another buddy from rotc...he's down in mesquite and the decision is made for him to pick me up monday night, stay the night with him down at his family's place in mesquite and spend all day with him and then we head to vegas. picks me up and fell asleep watching flushed away at his place. </div><div><br /></div><div>tuesday...</div><div>wake up and we head down the street to a buddy of his and we load up a single person powered parachute. head up to a cliff and his friend tried to take off with it but ended up snapping some of the parachute cords. head back and we take the double seaters out to a field, prep em, load up, and take off...it was amazing! after that was over we headed to lunch (mexican) and it was yummy. head to the house to change into golf appropriate attire and then head to falcon ridge. (the guy i was with, kagen-pronounced cajun-has free reign of the golf course since he dad was the one that designed the course...ya. apparently its a hobby for his dad to do that.) since the holes were busy we headed to play some pool...watched some tv...and then finally headed out to hole 6 to start out. so i had a hard time at first...honestly i did. sadly the typical golf teaching moment to teach how to swing was done...but thats cause honestly nothing else was working. once that was done i did really well and took pointers with better understanding. i did fairly well....ok actually i did better than kagen which is sad lol. after that we stopped to see what movies were playing, grabbed dinner, and then went back to the theater and watched the book of eli (which if you havent seen, its a really good movie with a twist at the end but just makes it that much better). after that, head back to his house, take a shower, get dressed for the airport, check in online and print off my boarding passes...hop in the truck with kagen and we head to vegas. we get to the airport and park...we had a hard time finding my airline...asked for some directions to get there...apparently its quite the walk from where we were. my only luggage was two carry ons- a backpack and a duffle-tote thing. we were looking in terminal 1...we had to go out, walk quite a ways, and then find terminal 2. we finally got there and as i walk up to security we say bye and he leaves. you know those new security scanners that you stand still and place your hands above your head? they had those...just for this particular terminal...weird. anyways, i made it through no problemo and once i found a seat at my gate i call grant up (ill prolly bounce back and forth between grant and woody from habit so try not to get lost). we talk for quite a while and i start my mp3 up after hanging up. brushed teeth, downed the meds, and boarded the plane. </div><div><br /></div><div>wednesday...</div><div>my flight left at 0245 and ill put it this way...i wasnt past song 5 and when i woke up my battery was flashing at me and was playing song 101...i shut it off and looked outside...it was beautiful! ...blue sky, blue water, and an gorgeous green island right there...landed at oahu, changed to another gate and saw the open part of the airport with the garden and such there in the middle of the airport...got to my gate and changed my seat to a left side window as directed by woody. sat and talked to some people that were heading to the same place but were just on the flight before me. they were from canada and we were talking about how this is my spring break and talked about my school...which brought up utah. they talked about visiting sites on oahu...like byu-hawaii and then the temple. i asked if they were members...no they werent but he had been a religion teacher and was interested in other religions and loved learning more about other religions...(perfect set-up huh?). he explained how the temple grounds were gorgeous and that he had wanted to go inside and upon finding out he couldnt, he asked why...he said they explained it and i sat there nodding my head....so he then asked if i was mormon and i said yes i was...so he started asking me questions and he and his wife had to board their flight so i was like if youre interested in learning more here are some sites you can trust and handed him a sticky note with info on it and told him he can open up a phonebook and find the number of a church near him back home and could get ahold of the missionaries that way...(slick)...he thanked me and i never saw them again...got on my flight, only an hour, and i landed on kauai...(the island they filmed jurassic park, pirates of the caribbean, and many more things). i was way excited and when i saw woodys parents i knew he was close by...sure enough he was standing off to the side with the camera and we found out later that i since i was practically running the pictures all came out blurry....i then got a lei (fake and blue but itll last longer than real flowers). gave him a big hug...said hello to his parents. we got in the car and on the way to the condo we stopped to pick up some coconuts off the side of the road. once at the condo i changed into a bathing suit and a dress and we headed east. along the way we would stop and take pictures...more like woody would take the pics (since i disabled my phone so i would only be reached if i wanted to be). our first real stop was at <b>kee beach</b>...beautiful! there was even a monk seal cub sunning itself on the beach that had been roped off so no one could mess with him. on the way back east we stopped at the <b>maniniholo dry cave</b> where we all got to explore the cave...we went back as far as possible but the gab gets smaller and smaller the further you go. i had an urge just to scream in the dark recess of the cave to see what people would do...so i did. grant even knew it was coming and he jumped...lets just say i have some lungs and know how to scream! it was funny...next stop was the <b>waikanaloa wet cave</b>...pretty cool looking and hasnt really been explored...stop to see some waterfalls and the taro fields. the sites and such are just beyond words. also...there are chickens everywhere. its illegal to kill the wild ones...so there are chickens everywhere you go. hens, roosters, and chicks just wander the island. unfortunately i dont remember what we did after that...if we just went to the condo and stayed there or if we went more east and then headed back to our place...anyway it was a nice first day. sleeping arrangements get decided on-i get the mattress from the fold out couch. its laid on the floor and we put sheets and a blanket on it. add a pillow and the woody puts the couch cushions back on the couch and he sleeps on the couch. he and i have the living room and his parents have the bedroom. every night he tucks me in makes sure im all situated for bed before he crawls in his bed. </div><div><br /></div><div>thursday...</div><div>after waking up, woody and i went walking down the beach in bathing suits...took lots of pictures and found lots of cool stuff!! there was a baby squid that had washed up on the beach, a couple of crabs i got to chase, a little hut made from driftwood, elephant leaves, and bark that was just sitting there on the beach, and a hawaiian guy came up and began net fishing off the shore. it was cool to watch him. headed back to the condo and met up with his parents...a guy sitting with them noticed the hibiscus in my hair and asked if it was in the right ear. (in hawaii there is a meaning as to when a flower is on a certain side). i looked at him and said that yes it was in the right ear but looked at woody. his parents even gave him an odd look lol...so the next time he put a flower in my hair he put it over the proper ear...(right side= single, available. left side= taken, married). ...its in the left side now. </div><div><br /></div>*rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04692970247597606490noreply@blogger.com